


When the Concrete Turned to Sand

by Vikingfangirl23



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Aide Zuko, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Bending (Avatar TV), Angst, Anxiety, Bisexual Sokka (Avatar), Bisexual Suki (Avatar), Blind Character, Coronavirus, F/F, Gay Zuko (Avatar), Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Insomniac!Zuko, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Katara, Lesbian Toph Beifong, Librarian Sokka, Mention of Azula (Avatar), Mention of Ozai (Avatar), Modern AU, Nature, Nurse Hakoda, Ocean, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Multiple, POV Third Person Limited, Teacher Iroh, discussion of periods, mention of foster care, summertime romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:08:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25974166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vikingfangirl23/pseuds/Vikingfangirl23
Summary: Hakoda sent Katara and Sokka to Cape Cod to give them a break from his overwhelming anxiety about the coronavirus.Toph's parents brought her and Zuko there so that they could treat the pandemic like a vacation.During the summer of 2020, everyone is distant from the people they love. But on the beach and in the forest, they may have a chance to get closer to someone new.
Relationships: Aang & Katara (Avatar), Katara & Sokka (Avatar), Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko, Toph Beifong/Katara
Comments: 36
Kudos: 74





	1. In Search of Ordinary Things

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back!! A:TLA is so incredible that it cured me of my "I don't write fanfiction anymore" delusions and made me write the majority of this in just two weeks! The majority will be from Katara or Toph's POV, focused on their romance, but their families and friends are also very important to them and to the story. Zuko and Aang each have one chapter of their own.
> 
> I'm writing pretty directly about my experience as a teenage human in the United States in a pandemic. This was very therapeutic for me and it can be for you, but if constant discussion of coronavirus is just gonna stress you out, stop reading now.
> 
> Enjoy...

"Coming here was a good idea." Katara said.  
  
"Agreed. You really needed to get rid of that t-shirt tan." said Sokka.  
  
Katara slapped his shoulder gently with the back of her hand, but she was smiling. "C'mon. I mean because I feel happy. And peaceful."  
  
Ocean foam rushed up the wet sand to lap her bare feet as if in agreement. As if it had missed her. She took one last look over both shoulders, up towards the parking lot, and saw no one. It was safe. Carefully, Katara unlooped her cloth mask from her ears, folded it, and placed it in the pocket of her shorts. The smell of the salty waves grew stronger and she smiled and the feeling of sea breeze on her cheeks. She hadn't been outdoors without a mask, except on her tiny balcony in the city, in four months.  
  
"I wonder why no one else is here."  
  
"Probably because it's 6:00AM, genius. Everyone less paranoid than us is still in bed." Sokka said.  
  
Katara nodded. The sunrise-watching crowd had already passed through, but the sunbathers and wave jumpers hadn't yet arrived. There was nothing but open space around them, uncrowded with human bodies and uninfected by human breath. They were free.  
  
She stepped into the thin layer of water that rose over the sand. On its way back into the ocean, she felt warm patches of ocean flow over her feet, heated by the morning sun. Sokka stayed onshore as Katara waded in up to her ankles, to her shins, to her knees. She stopped there, unwilling to let the mask in her pocket get wet, although she wanted to feel the power of the water all over her body. Another day, she thought. It was only their first morning. There would be a whole week of vacation to plan ahead, bring a bag for her mask, and dive in.  
  
Then she saw the seal. It was only about 20 feet away, straight in front of her, head bobbing above the waves.  
  
"Hi," she whispered. "Hi, friend."  
  
It couldn't have heard her over the sound of the water, but it bobbed closer. Awe and joy grew in Katara's chest.  
  
"Charge!" Sokka sprinted past Katara, waving his arms and splashing. The seal dipped below the surface and disappeared.  
  
"Sokka! Stop! Why would you do that?"  
  
"Fun!"  
  
"STOP!"  
  
"But why?"  
  
"Because you're terrible!" Katara spluttered, wiping traces of Sokka's splashing from her face. "Your mask's in your pocket, right? So now it's soaking wet?"  
  
Her tone was sharper than she wanted it to be, but all of the daily anxiety she had felt living in the middle of Boston in the pandemic came rushing back. Their father, a nurse, had told them over and over that wet masks are less effective at blocking the virus, but more effective at blocking the air they needed to breathe. Katara turned and scanned the beach again for people -- all clear, as far as she could see.  
  
"Oh, shit," Sokka followed Katara back onto the sand. "I was so excited, I totally forgot."  
  
"I know." Katara tried not to sound resentful. "Let's just go back to the house and try again tomorrow morning. I'll bring a bag for our masks."  
  
She turned back to look for the seal one more time, but it was gone.  
  
Both teenagers put their masks back on before entering the parking lot, even though Sokka's was uncomfortably heavy with seawater. Two cars had arrived, and unmasked families were happily unloading beach toys. They gave them a wide berth, and headed for the narrow, pebbled path through the bushes to the house that they rented. Even though the rocks hurt their bare feet, they hurried to reduce the chance of passing another person. Whenever it was impossible to stay 6 feet from strangers, even when none were around, their hearts beat faster with anxiety.  
  
At least Dad isn't here, Katara told herself. At least the risk of going to the beach in the first place only applies to us, and not to him. She sighed with relief when they reached the house they were renting without seeing anyone else.  
  
But even that felt dangerous -- to rent and live in a space that someone else had lived in before. They wiped everything with disinfectant when they first arrived, and kept every window open and every fan on high to clear the air. Even still, they slept that first night on the screened-in porch, hoping that it was close enough to being outdoors to keep them safe.  
  
Katara tossed her mask into the "used" basket by the door and sat down heavily on the stoop to brush the sand from her legs.  
  
"I call first shower!" Sokka yelled.  
  
Katara didn't protest. She was barely dirty, and keeping traces of the ocean on her legs for a little bit longer sounded nice. Returning to the beach would be wonderful, but she knew that more cars and more people would already be pouring from the parking lot into the sand. Perhaps there was some other outdoor place she could explore instead. The house was lovely and she was, of course, privileged and grateful to have it, but there was only one room and the bathroom. After spending four months in their apartment with Sokka, she wasn't eager to spend even more time in a small space with him.  
  
Once, at least two years before, they had rented a bigger house in the same neighborhood for a week. Their dad had come, of course, and their neighbors Aang and Gyatso. Sokka had even brought his best friend Suki. The four kids spent that whole week together, on the beach from sunrise to sunset. That was when Aang was still a foster child, before Gyatso adopted him. It was when Suki and Sokka were just "very close friends," and not yet dating. And of course, it was long before any of them knew what a coronavirus was.  
  
"Sokka!" Katara called through the bathroom door. "I'm going for a walk around the neighborhood. I'll definitely be back before lunch, so don't eat without me."  
  
"No promises!" he yelled back over the sound of the shower.  
  
Katara rolled her eyes, put on shoes for the first time since arriving at the house, and looped a fresh mask around her ears. Before opening the front door, she looked both ways up and down the quiet street. No people. Safe.  
  
She turned away from the direction that turned led to the beach. Instead, she walked uphill, away from the faint sound of the water. Katara passed other houses like the one she was staying in, most also rented by families looking to get away from their quarantine locations. There were no blind corners or speed walking pedestrians like the ones that had tormented her in Boston, just wide open streets free of both people and cars.  
  
The direction Katara had chosen took her past houses that were farther and farther apart from each other. The paved road turned into dirt. Then, rather abruptly, the dirt road turned into a house's personal driveway, and the only way forward into the forest was a dirt trail only about a foot wide. A thin white rope was strung at hip height between the trees, marking the way forwards on both sides. With a growing sense of adventure and discovery, Katara began to follow the trail.  
  
Only a few feet in, the trail split in two. Both of her options had a guard rope on only one side of the trail. On a whim, Katara picked right. The forest was dense and free of wildlife. At least, free of wildlife that Katara could see. The path was carefully cleared of sticks, rocks, and plants, but the ground was still uneven and hilly. At the crest of one small hill, she stopped to look down into a valley thick with trees, bushes, and vines. It was almost as calming to be here as it was to be at the edge of the sea.  
  
Then she heard the breathing. From behind her, the sound of a pair of lungs working hard, rhythmically. Katara turned and saw a girl running towards her along the path, one hand grasping the guard rope, feet bare. Dread rose in her stomach when she realized that the girl had no mask and that the trail was far too narrow for her to pass safely. One or both of them would have to bushwhack into the brush to get past each other. And worse, the girl wasn't stopping or even slowing down.  
  
"Look out!" Katara yelled.  
  
The girl skidded to a halt about 15 feet away and let go of the rope to fumble in her pocket. Katara saw that she had a cloth mask. "Who's there?" she yelled back, hurriedly putting the mask on.  
  
"I'm Kat-- oh, shit. Yeah, Kat. I'm Kat." Katara said. She had always meant to choose a go-to fake name to give to strangers, but had never settled on one. Or if she had, she had forgotten it in the long months she spent indoors.  
  
"The fuck kind of person doesn't know her own name," said the girl.  
  
Katara bit her lip. "Well, what's yours?"  
  
"Jessie." the girl said. "That's the name I give strangers. See, it's not so hard to pick one if you have half a brain."  
  
Katara furrowed her brow. "That's rich, coming from someone who runs full tilt in the forest, without a mask on, with another person stopped right in front of her."  
  
"I'm blind." said the girl.  
  
"You what?"  
  
"I'm blind. I can't see. You were standing still and being really quiet, so I had no way of knowing you were there. And I'm sorry, my first estimate was clearly too high -- you can't have more than a quarter of a brain."  
  
Katara was torn between the instinct to argue back and the shame she felt at yelling at a blind girl. The latter won out. "I'm so sorry. I had no idea! I shouldn't have assumed you could see, and I shouldn't have been mad at you for running--"  
  
"I don't care," the girl said. "But… you haven't been getting your germy hands all over my ropes, have you?"  
  
"What? No." Katara said truthfully. "I just walked next to them. And I've had my mask on the whole time I was here."  
  
"Good." the girl said. "Can you come a little closer so we're yelling at each other less? Still stay 6 feet, of course."  
  
"Of course." Katara said. She walked down the hill, closing most of the gap. "Is this better?"  
  
"Sure. Now you can explain to me in detail why the hell you're in my backyard."  
  
Katara opened her mouth to speak, but drew a blank. There was no good explanation. And there was no way she could have predicted that her first conversation with a new person in four months would be in a forest on Cape Cod with a very angry barefoot blind girl. Nothing had prepared her for this.  
  
"I didn't… know it was your backyard?"  
  
"The road ending in a driveway with my family's car parked in it, directly next to our house, didn't clue you in?"  
  
"No."  
  
"God, you're dumb. If my parents had been the ones to run into you here, they would have chased you off the property, if not called the police on you."  
  
"Are you going to do that?" Katara asked seriously. She had always been afraid of the police, but being threatened while staying in a neighborhood where she knew no one while her father was still in Boston was a new level of fear. Only after she spoke did she realize that the girl couldn't see that she was a dark-skinned Inuk, and probably assumed from her voice that she was talking to a white girl. "Please don't do that." she added.  
  
"No, I don't think I will." the girl said. "It's COVID times. I've only spoken to three people since my school closed in March. The rules are different now."  
  
"Thank you." Katara sighed with relief. "So… what are you going to do?"  
  
The girl tilted her head to one side in thought. "Um. Do you want to go hang out with me?"  
  
Katara blinked. The girl's expression was dead serious. "Yeah. Why not?"  
  
"Yeah. Why not." she repeated. "My name is actually Toph, by the way."  
  
"Toph." Katara said. "I'm Katara. And nobody calls me Kat. Please don't."  
  
"Heh. Maybe I will, just to spite you." Toph grinned crookedly. She pointed past Katara. "Keep walking that way. There's a clearing where we can sit down and chill for a while. Don't touch my rope."  
  
"I won't." Katara promised. "Wait, do you need help walking?"  
  
"Kat. The more you talk, the more concerned I am for your brain. You just saw me sprint along this trail with no problem at all. Of course I can walk." Toph said.  
  
"Sorry, I'm sorry." said Katara again. It seemed safest to just walk forwards and stop talking. She was glad that walking single file, neither of them could see each other's faces.  
  
"So how old are you? What do you look like?" Toph asked.  
  
"I'm seventeen." said Katara. "And, uh… I'm Inuit."  
  
"Inuit? Like, Native American?"  
  
"Like, indigenous to the Arctic."  
  
"Okay. Keep going."  
  
"I'm taller than you. I think I'm 5'6" now. I have long hair in a braid and smaller strands of hair in loops on either side of my face. I'm wearing blue shorts and a tank top and converse sneakers. My mask is black. Yours is green, like your clothes."  
  
"Dude, you should've quit while you were ahead. I know what I'm wearing. I picked green on purpose because I want to be the same color as the forest, even if I can't see it. I just asked about you."  
  
Katara flushed bright red. "I'm so sorry--"  
  
"Okay, I'm done with apologies. Calm down." said Toph. "I'm sixteen, since you asked."  
  
"Oh. Cool." Katara bit her lip. It was overwhelming to have… what, a potential friend? A new person close to her age for the first time in months. A new person who didn't already know everything about her. It was exhilarating. And very scary. Especially because so far, she couldn't seem to say anything right.  
  
"Bruh. You missed the clearing." Toph said. Katara turned and saw that Toph had ducked underneath the guard rope and was sitting in a relatively wide, flat space with only moss and small plants on the ground.  
  
"Sorry." Katara felt like kicking herself for apologizing again. And for doing something stupid that required apologizing, again. She walked back a few feet and ducked under the rope as well -- careful not to touch it -- and sat down. "You know this place really well."  
  
"Yep. My aide and I cleared the trail and the clearing and set up the guide rope. See the duct tape?" Toph pointed at the rope next to the clearing, and Katara saw that about a foot of it was covered with duct tape. "That's how I know where the clearing is. It's also the halfway mark for my running loop."  
  
"Oh, cool." Katara said. "Who's your aide?"  
  
"His name's Zuko. He's pretty cool. He helped me make the trail, and if I want to run somewhere other than this loop, he runs with me." Katara couldn't tell, but she thought that Toph might have been frowning under her mask. "No one but us and my parents has ever been in my loop before."  
  
"Oh." Everything that Toph said made her think of a million more questions. Was Zuko Toph's age? Was he more of a friend, or more of a teacher? What could Toph do without him and what did she need him for?  
  
"Are you scared to ask more questions?" Toph asked. She buried her hands in the leaf litter and began to fidget with a stick.  
  
"No?" Katara said. "But… sort of?"  
  
Toph rolled her eyes. "God, I had forgotten this part of meeting new people. It's fine. You can ask questions."  
  
"Okay." Katara swallowed. "I guess… what can you do without Zuko? Like, how much is he part of your life?"  
  
"Not that much anymore, honestly." Toph said. "He's lived with me for two years, and before that, I had a nanny. In March, when we first came here to our vacation house, I needed a lot of help finding everything and making this trail so I could go outside without help, but now I only hang out with him a little bit every day. We tell my parents he does more so that they keep paying him."  
  
"That's kind of you."  
  
"I hope so." Toph snapped her stick in half. "Tell me about you. Who do you spend the most time with?"  
  
"My brother Sokka." Katara smiled at the thought. "He's nineteen. And my dad, but he's at home in Boston."  
  
"Yo, you live in Boston? I live in Cambridge, right by the river."  
  
"That's crazy! We're basically neighbors," Katara laughed.  
  
"What do you like to do in Boston?" Toph asked.  
  
"I don't go downtown much, especially now. I mostly stay in Oak Square, where I live, with my best friend Aang. We live in different apartments in the same tripledecker house. We hung out every day before we started social distancing. Then we had to figure out how to go for socially distant walks, and how to stay friends over facetime."  
  
"Ugh. Facetime sucks. It's so far from being together in person." Toph said.  
  
"Totally." They were both silent for a second. "Sorry, I just don't know how to talk to people without talking about the pandemic."  
  
"Don't apologize for that." Toph said sharply. "People who can talk without talking about it don't know how privileged they are."  
  
Katara raised her eyebrows, thinking about the fact that she and Sokka were rich enough that they could spend a week on Cape Cod on only one adult's salary, and as an even more extreme example, Toph's family apparently owned a vacation home with a huge, forested backyard and could afford to hire a live-in aide. Their combined privilege was enormous.  
  
"Yeah. I guess." she said.  
  
"Did you hesitate because you were thinking about how rich I am?" Toph asked.  
  
Katara blinked. She was still getting used to Toph's bluntness. "Uhh..."  
  
"Because you should have been. I know that my parents are the people who can talk without talking about the pandemic. Their work was already basically nothing and totally doable online. So they do talk without talking about the pandemic, constantly. But I can't because, surprise surprise, it's really hard to translate the experience of going to an in-person school specifically for people with visual impairments. I get to deal with a massive disruption of my life from my vacation house, but it's still a massive disruption of my life."  
  
Katara nodded in understanding.  
  
"Does that make sense?" Toph asked.  
  
"Yeah, sorry, I was nodding."  
  
This time Toph didn't jump on Katara's apology. She just nodded back. "It takes practice."  
  
"My life was disrupted, too." Katara said. "It's worse for my dad and Sokka. Dad's a nurse. He started working 60 hours a week. And Sokka was taking a gap year and working at the public library, but it closed. He was going to go to college in the fall. He still hasn't decided if he's gonna go."  
  
"Ugh. The future." Toph hugged her knees. "The future sucks. Do you know what you're going to do? Like, after high school?"  
  
"I think so," she said. "I think I want to be a nurse like my dad. So I would have to go to college and do a nursing program."  
  
"That's cool. Especially now, that's a really good goal to have." said Toph. "I don't know what to do."  
  
"Well, what do you like?"  
  
"Running. And lifting weights." Toph said. "But I'm not that good at either. Like when I was little I thought I could go to the paralympics, but my times just aren't good enough. And I don't think my parents would let me anyway."  
  
"Are they protective?" Katara asked knowingly, thinking of her own dad's obsession with protecting her and Sokka from the coronavirus over the last few months.  
  
"Yeah. But I think the word I would use is clueless. It's like, I'm their token blind child. So they tell me that I can't do anything, and don't let me try things, but then when I do manage to do something they think I can't, it's all they talk about and all over their social media. So we're not close. But they're also not terrible. I have some freedom." Toph said. "Like back at the start of May when people started talking about making and wearing reusable masks in public, I decided I wanted to make some. So I bought myself a sewing machine and learned how to use it. Zuko traced and cut out the fabric, and then I was able to sew them together by feel. We ship them out to homeless shelters and food distribution sites."  
  
"Woah! How many did you make?"  
  
"Over 80 and counting." Toph smiled with pride. "It started out really slow, but Zuko and I are a lot faster now."  
  
"I should have done that," said Katara.  
  
"Hey," Toph said. She reached out as if to touch Katara, but of course they were too far apart. "You're too hard on yourself."  
  
Katara chuckled a little, glad that Toph couldn't see her blush. Talking to a person who could only hear her was making her hyperaware of everything she could see. But honestly, all she was looking at was Toph. She could see the layer of dust clinging to the fine hairs on her legs, the veins in her feet, the shade her bangs cast on her face. It had taken most of their conversation, but she was finally getting used to the fact that she could stare straight into Toph's eyes without it being awkward, because she would never know.  
  
"I like talking to you," Toph said.  
  
Katara blushed. "Okay." Wait, that felt like the wrong thing to say. "I mean, uh..."  
  
"It's okay. You don't have to like it back."  
  
"No, I do. I actually do." Katara said. "Can I meet you here again tomorrow? Same time? Wait, what time is it now?" She fumbled with her phone in her pocket. "It's 8:00. Can we meet again at 8:00 tomorrow?"  
  
"Yeah," Toph said. "It'll be nice to have another early morning riser around. But don't touch my ropes."  
  
"I won't. I promise." Katara said again. "Will you walk me around the other side of the loop? I'm sure it's beautiful."  
  
"I wouldn't know about beautiful, but it is fun to run," Toph said. "You lead the way."  
  
They both stood and ducked back under the duct-taped guide rope. Katara walked straight down the middle of the path at an even pace, trying to make it easy for Toph to keep the right distance. Toph's bare feet were nearly silent compared to Katara's sneakered footfalls, so she began watching the rope beside her bounce with the movement of Toph's steps rather than listening to know she was there.  
  
"I miss meeting new people," Katara said.  
  
"Yeah, it's special," said Toph. "It's just another little thing we've lost this year."  
  
"So talking to you is like getting it back," Katara replied.  
  
"It is. You're welcome." Toph said. Katara glanced over her shoulder and saw that she was smiling.  
  
"Hey, you're welcome, too. You owe this whole conversation to my daring decision to trespass."  
  
"More like your oblivious, accidental trespassing, but okay, I'll let you take the win." Toph said.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
They walked in silence for a moment.  
  
"Are you really going to come tomorrow?" Toph asked. "If you're not going to, then just tell me. I have other things I want to do instead of just waiting in the woods for you to show up."  
  
"Yes. I'll come. I promise." said Katara.  
  
The single-roped path merged with the other side of the loop, where Katara had started her walk, and both girls walked back up the entrance to Toph's driveway. Katara started to wave, then remembered that Toph couldn't see it.  
  
"Bye, Toph. I'll see you tomorrow at 8." she said.  
  
"Bye." Toph said. She shrugged and walked towards the house with no rope to guide her. She must have known the way well. Still, Katara watched until she saw the back door of the house close behind her.  
  
\----------  
  
That afternoon Katara found herself daydreaming on the porch. It wasn't that there was nothing to do -- she could try going to the beach and hope there was space. She could write in her journal or watch Netflix, like Sokka was doing, or go for a walk to explore a new direction. She and Sokka could call Suki or Aang together to check in. Instead, she found herself unable to focus long enough to pick. Her mind kept gravitating back to Toph.  
  
Not just to Toph, but to all of the things they couldn't do together. They couldn't swim in the ocean. They couldn't cook or bake something new. They couldn't give each other tours of their rooms or do each other's hair. Katara had hoped that the impossibility of all of these ideas would make them easier to dismiss, but it didn't. It made her want them more.  
  
An idea for something she could do occurred to Katara as her gaze passed over the bag of clean masks by the front door. She carefully retrieved a black bandana, which they kept in case they ran out of closer-fitting cloth masks. She folded it into a long, narrow strip and tied it over her eyes.  
  
At once, she felt more… alone. She could hear cars from a distant road, or maybe that was the ocean. One bird repeated a two-note call. All she could feel were her clothes on her body and the woven mat beneath her feet.  
  
In search of more information, more connections, Katara stepped forwards with arms outstretched. She reached nothing. Two more steps and she grazed the door with her fingertips and the concrete threshold with her toes. With her vision, the same distance felt much shorter, perhaps because she usually took longer, more confident steps.  
  
She stepped through the door onto the flat stones that made up the walkway. With every new place her foot touched, she discovered new pebbles, sand, pine needles, grass, weeds, and moss. It was like exploring the ground in slow motion, or with a magnifying glass. It was fascinating. And it was Toph.  
  
Katara imagined her new friend standing beside her, urging her forwards.With her hands outstretched to touch Katara's. With her bare feet planted on the same ground. With her lips breathing the same air. She inhaled sharply. What had she been thinking, leaving the house with her eyes covered but not her mouth and nose? She pulled off the bandana and ran back inside. She closed the screen door tightly behind her, not because it actually made her safer, but because it made her feel just a little bit safer. She missed that feeling. She chased it constantly, even though it always led her back to being inside, alone.

  



	2. How Much of a Tree Bends in the Wind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up: Discussion of periods/tampons/cramps is coming. Some angst.
> 
> My random thoughts about Toph: I think that if the Beifongs had a child in our modern world instead of the ATLA world, they would feel more comfortable and open about raising a child with a disability (and even profit from/exploit that disability… but you'll see about that later.) As a result, Toph in this fic is a little softer and more well-adjusted than she initially is in ATLA, and her relationship with her parents (while still pretty terrible) is better. Just wanted to give a vague explanation of my thoughts :) Go ahead and read now!

Toph woke up to the sound of birds and wind through her open windows. Without moving from bed, she passed her fingers over her phone screen. "5:58 AM. Tuesday, July 21." the automated voice reported. Toph groaned. She usually slept in until at least 6:30, if not 7:00, but her body felt anxious to move this morning.

As soon as she stood from her bed, she felt the heavy wetness between her legs that told her that she had bled through her tampon and onto her backup pad during the night. At least she knew it was the last day of her period. When she removed the tampon and relieved herself, something deep in her stomach clenched with pain. After inserting a fresh tampon, she made sure to take an ibuprofen. If she'd thought about it, she would have taken one the night before to let it build up in her system, but she had had someone else on her mind.

Ah. Katara. Kat. Toph snickered. The girl who wandered into her woods. The only mysterious and new person that had appeared in her life since her school closed and she moved to the Cape in March. The most important person for that day.

Toph hummed under her breath as she got herself ready, still hunching over the twisting pain in her stomach. Her bare feet took her downstairs to the cool tile of the kitchen, where she traced the edge of the counter with her fingertips to navigate to the cereal, bowls, fridge, and silverware. After eating quickly and noisily, she considered changing out of the clothes she had worn the day before and slept in. Would Katara notice and think badly of her for it? Toph shook the intrusive thought from her mind. The opinions of a stranger in the woods didn't matter. Besides, Katara wouldn't be able to smell her from 6 feet away with a mask on, anyway. It was fine.

"Zuko." Toph knocked gently on her friend's door. "Zuko, wake up." She listened as his bed creaked, his soft footsteps approached her, and his bedroom door creaked open.

"Why are you up so early?" he groaned, and she heard him step back, giving her space to lean in the doorway while she talked to him.

"I'm going to the loop. I won't be back until like 10:00. So don't let Mom and Dad worry."

"Okay. Take your phone."

"I'll be fine without it," Toph resisted automatically.

"I know you will. But still. They'll bother me about it."

Toph sighed. She didn't wish her parents' nagging on anyone. "Okay."

"And Toph?"

"Huh?"

"Your breath stinks. Brush your damn teeth."

Toph socked him in what felt like his shoulder. "You suck."

Zuko just snickered. "You'll do it, though."

"Yes, I'll do it. And I'll take my phone."

"Thanks, Toph."

"'Course."

She turned to leave, listening for the door closing gently behind her.

\----------

"6:51 AM. Tuesday, Ju-"

Toph lifted her finger from her phone screen, stopping the voice before it finished. There was still so much time before Katara would arrive. "Siri, play Jim Cain." She turned the volume up and slipped her phone into her pocket, letting it play to the whole forest. The gentle acoustic song had been on repeat for her since school closed.  _ I started out in search of ordinary things _ … Bill Callahan sang. 

Before stepping from the porch onto the pebbled driveway, she put on her mask. Just in case Katara came early. That thought was so stupid, she almost took it off again. There was no reason for her to come early to see a girl who had threatened her the moment they met, or really, for her to come at all. Toph hesitated, fingers on the ties of her mask, but decided to leave it on. She had some hope. Not a lot, but enough.

Walking her first lap around the loop, Toph was struck again by just how much pain she was in. Each time that she bent down to remove a branch or leaf from the path, she felt as though her organs were crawling over each other to get to entirely new positions. She moved at a snail's pace, only making it around the loop three times before it was nearly 8:00 and time for her to take her seat in the clearing. At least she was satisfied that the path was free of debris and ready for running by then. Maybe a light jog after talking to Katara would make her stomach feel a little better, and her legs a little less heavy.

Then she heard the footprints. She paused the music just in time to hear her voice: "Hi, Toph."

"Hi, Kat," Toph flashed a crooked smile, hoping it showed through her eyes above her mask.

"Are you gonna call me that forever?" Katara's voice tightened as she ducked under the guide rope and sat heavily in the clearing.

"Yes," said Toph. "I'm glad you came. I've been having the worst cramps, and making fun of you is going to be a great distraction."

"Oh, there are better ways to get rid of cramps than distraction," Katara said.

"I know, I know. I took some Ibuprofen. I might go for a jog later, too."

"I have a better idea."

Toph tilted her head to the side. There was a new excitement in her tone. "What?"

"You'll need swim bottoms or pants that can get wet. And we need a long stick that we can hold between us so we can walk outside of the loop and still be distant from each other."

"Woah, woah, hold up. You want me to just follow you outside the loop and trust that you can lead the way safely? And you want me to get wet? I hate getting wet. Is this some kind of kidnapping plot? Do you have a period fetish?"

"No! Oh my god, no." Toph could practically hear Katara blushing. It took her a moment to get her words together and continue explaining. 

"I promise that I'll keep you safe and away from people. I promise that I'll bring you back whenever you ask. And you don't have to say yes, I just… I want to surprise you. I genuinely think you'll like it."

Toph pressed her lips together in thought. She believed Katara's promises, and she had always been good at telling truth from lies. She trusted her own judgement that Katara was telling the truth about this one thing, even if she didn't fully trust Katara yet. And besides, the alternative to playing along with whatever adventure her new friend had planned was another identical day of running the same routes and making the same masks. That wasn't something she was eager to experience.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay. We'll try it. I might change my mind, so don't screw this up. I haven't been off the property here without Zuko. Ever, I think. So you have to tell me everything that's happening."

"Okay! I will!" Katara stood and brushed a layer of dirt and leaves from the seat of her shorts. "I just came from the beach, so I'm still in swim clothes. How about you go home to get changed and I'll look around the woods for a long enough stick?"

"Yeah. Sounds good." Toph ducked under the guide rope before standing, then hunched slightly over her aching stomach. The more she thought about Katara's idea, the more problems she thought of. "Zuko and I usually use resistance bands when we walk together, but I don't think any of them are long enough for us. I've never used a stick before. I've never walked with someone six feet apart before. This is going to be weird."

"It's okay. We'll figure it out together. I'll head this way along the loop looking for sticks, okay?"

"Okay. Don't touch my ropes." 

"I won't!" Katara's voice was already getting farther away.

Toph dropped her phone into the leaf litter of the clearing before turning and walking the other way along the loop, towards home. She knew that her parents were checking her location and that wherever Katara was taking her, her parents wouldn't like it. Her footfalls grew quieter and quieter as she left the loop and entered the house, on a mission to retrieve her swimsuit without waking anyone.

She shuddered when the stretchy material settled around her skin. She had managed to go nearly a full year without wearing it, and that was the way she liked it. Swimsuits just felt so different from her normal, loose clothes. She ran her hands over her body from shoulders to hips, feeling how the suit pushed up her boobs and exposed her stomach. It sat lower than her usual underwear, and covered less of her ass.

"Zuko?" Toph knocked on his door, even more softly than the last time.

"Again, Toph? What do you need? Oh." 

Toph knew that he had opened the door to see her. She held her hands in front of her stomach, pulling at her fingers. She hated the feeling that she was more exposed to other people than they were to her. "Is it okay? I haven't worn it in ages."

"Yes, but Toph, where are you going? What are you doing?"

"I made a friend. She's waiting for me. I'll tell you more when I get back. But you don't have to worry. I trust her. I'll be safe. And distant, 100%."

She heard the door creak again and assumed Zuko was opening it wider. "Toph..."

"What?"

"I'm choosing to believe you. I'm gonna believe you that it's safe. But really… remember that anything risky you do, is a risk that all of us will have to live with."

"I know. Goodbye."

"Toph!"

She scampered away. Quick -- to her closet, to grab a loose dress to throw over her suit. Then to the laundry room, where she put on a fresh mask. To the front porch, where her little-used white cane sat. Then to the driveway.

"I got a stick!" said Katara. "Here, just stand still, and I'll lift it and put one end in your hand."

"Is it long enough?" Toph asked, putting her free hand out with her palm up.

"Yes. It's a solid two feet taller than me." Katara said. Toph felt rough bark in her palm and grasped onto it. Katara gave a little tug, and in response, Toph took a step forward.

"I could get used to this," Toph said, and smiled. Anxiety was still leaping in her chest from her talk with Zuko, and from the feeling of her suit's straps digging into her shoulders, and from the power that she was giving Katara.

"Someone inside your house is coming," said Katara suddenly.

"Hide." Toph hissed. She felt the stick drop to the ground and heard footsteps receding back into the loop. Idiot. She should have run down the street away from the family's property, not further into it.

The screen door opened and closed. "Toph, it's just me."

Toph felt her shoulders relax at the sound of Zuko's voice. "Leave us alone."

"Calm down. I just wanted to tell you to have fun."

She frowned. His voice was sincere.

"Because I don't know when either of us will get to-- to make a new friend, or to try something new again. So you can't just be safe. You have to also have fun."

"Thanks, Zuko."

"Now leave before we wake your parents up." 

"Okay." Toph heard the door close behind him when he went back inside. "Katara! Come back!" Toph tried to whisper-yell into the forest. Luckily, Katara hadn't gone far. She picked up her end of the stick. "Let's go."

They walked briskly and quietly up the dirt driveway. It was familiar under Toph's feet and cane, and she didn't want to make any more noise by asking questions. She simply walked behind Katara, stick linking them front-to-back. 

"Are you going to be okay walking barefoot on the concrete?" Katara asked when they reached the end of the driveway.

"Yeah, my feet are tough from running in the woods. It'll just feel different. From my cane I can tell if there's a big obstacle or change coming, but it would still be great if you could let me know if I'm gonna step on a smaller piece of glass or something."

"Okay, I'll keep an eye out," Katara said. "How am I doing so far? Am I as good as Zuko?"

Toph laughed. "Well, if you really want to find out, you could try taking me for a ten mile run. If you succeed at that, you can say you're even with him."

"Oh, god, no," said Katara. "I'll leave the extreme runs to him."

"I thought so." Toph smiled at Katara's back. "So, I need a little more information about where we're going. Like how far it is and how long we're spending there."

"It's only a 10 minute walk, over concrete, pebbles, more concrete, and then sand. And we can spend as little as 10 minutes there or as long as… hours, I guess. As long as it doesn't get crowded."

"We're clearly going to the beach," Toph said.

"I mean, yes, we're going to the beach. But we're going to do my special beach cure for period cramps. So it's still special."

"I think you may have an inflated sense of your healing skills. So far, I only feel worse." Toph said honestly.

"Do you need me to slow down?"

"No. No, let's just get there, and then get home, and then I'll just curl up in bed reading stupid buzzfeed articles for hours."

Katara laughed. "That sounds like what my brother Sokka does all day. Wait-"

"What?" Toph stopped, afraid that Katara had cut herself off because of some danger that she couldn't see.

"Just… can I ask you a question about being blind?"

Toph rolled her eyes, then remembered that Katara couldn't see behind her. "Yes."

"How do you read online?"

"Text-to-speech app. It's like an audiobook, but with the whole internet."

"Oh, wow. That's great."

"Yeah." Toph bit the inside of her cheek. She had forgotten this, too -- that whenever she was talking about being blind with a new person, it was hard to steer the conversation back to anything else. "So what did you do the rest of the day yesterday?"

"Um." Katara hesitated. "I spent a lot of time in my yard. But then it felt unsafe, so I went back inside and watched Netflix with Sokka."

"Unsafe because of people breathing near you?" Toph asked. She got no answer. "Are you nodding?"

"Yeah, sorry, sorry."

"It's okay. You'll remember eventually." Toph said. "Can you see any breathing people near us now?"

"Uh, no," Katara said. "It's still early enough that everybody's inside. I'll tell you, though. Whenever I see anybody."

"Great."

"Oh, and I should tell you -- we're about to go from the street to a narrow pathway between bushes. It's paved at first, but then you'll feel it drop off a few inches into pebbles. This is the way to the parking lot above the beach." Katara said.

"Thanks." Toph said. She was starting to think that she had been here before in a past summer, before she demanded enough autonomy from her parents that she could simply refuse to go to the beach. The pebbles felt familiar beneath her feet. Her rising fear of the ocean did too.

"We're in the parking lot now. There are three parked cars, but no people and no moving cars, so we can walk right through." Katara said.

Now Toph could hear the ocean, loud and constant. It was starting to cover Katara's voice, and make her words fuzzy around the edges. She could feel how huge it was, and how small she was. She gripped her stick and cane a little more tightly and steeled herself, ready to pretend that she wasn't afraid.

"Okay, I can see up and down the beach now. There are five groups of people, all spread out from each other and staying pretty still. In a few steps, you'll be on dry, soft sand that makes it a little harder to walk. We'll walk to the right for about half the length of a football field and then we'll be really far away from everyone." said Katara.

"Okay, aide Katara," Toph said, trying to distract herself with compliments and jokes for her friend. "Ten mile run or not, I'm going to let Zuko know that his job is in danger."

Katara laughed, but the sound of it blended into the waves and was carried away by the wind. The sand felt foreign beneath Toph's feet, like it was grabbing her and preventing her from running like she wanted to. She was out of practice with her cane and didn't think she had ever used it on such uneven sand before, so she kept getting the tip stuck in small dunes. Finally, when she was nearly ready to call it a day, she felt the stick press back on her hand, telling her that Katara had slowed and stopped.

"This is a good spot! No people for a solid 50 feet in all directions. Come forwards a little more."

The sand turned cool and firm under Toph's feet. She touched her cane out in front of her and felt it pushed back towards her by a small, rippling wave, probably only a few inches deep. "Are you gonna make me go in?" she asked, flatly, so that her nerves didn't show in her voice.

"Not exactly. Here, can you put your cane down behind you? Make sure it's far enough that it doesn't get washed away." Katara said. Toph leaned back up the beach to do as she said. As the cane left her hand, she was struck by how much trust she was putting in the girl on the other end of the stick. What if the tide came in too suddenly and the cane did get washed away? Or the stick broke? Or--

"Sit down right where you are."

"You want me to sit in the muddy sand?"

"It's not muddy, it's just wet. This is why I told you to come in swimsuit bottoms, but you went and put on a nice dress instead."

"Oh." The new feelings under Toph's feet had distracted her from the swimsuit she wore underneath her dress. She gently placed her end of the stick on the sand and grasped the hem of her dress to pull it up over her head, careful to keep her mask in place. Ocean spray tickled her skin and she shivered, exposed. "Can you watch my dress and cane to make sure nothing happens to them?" she asked.

"Of course." said Katara. "And your swimsuit. It, uh, it looks really good on you."

"Thanks." Toph could feel herself blushing. She felt like she was on the reflective side of a one-way mirror. "So I should just sit?"

"Yeah. Right where you are."

Toph put her hands and knees down in the sand first, then sat down on her bottom. The cool sand sculpted itself to her body.

"Now put your feet out straight in front of you."

Toph did as she was told.

"Hmm. I think we need to scoot like two feet forwards." Katara said. Toph scooted, trusting that Katara was doing the same.

"Here comes the water."

"FUCK! That's too fucking cold!" Toph jumped up and fumbled back away from the waves to the dry sand.

"Toph! Get it together! You just have to get used to it. You didn't even let it get past your knees."

"Is this some kind of fuckin… temperature play experiment you're doing on me?"

"What's temperature play?" Katara asked.

"Wow. You're really that innocent. Okay." Toph took a step back towards the water. "How is this supposed to help my cramps? Other than make me so cold that I can't think about anything else?"

"It's like an ice pack," Katara said. "It cools you down and numbs your angry nerve endings. But the ocean's better than an ice pack you get out of the fridge because you can make it cover more of your body and it has built in breaks. When a wave comes in, it cools you, but when it goes back out, your body has a chance to regulate its temperature and keep you from accidentally icing too hard and damaging your skin."

Toph hesitated, still a few steps from the water's edge. "That sounds legit but I still don't like it," she said.

"Give it a chance." said Katara.

So she did. Her fingers felt around for the hollow her bottom had already made in the sand, and she settled herself back into it. She tensed when Katara said a wave was coming, but didn't jump up. She let it flow up her calves, to the tender spot behind her knees, up her thighs, to pool under the ache between her legs. And it felt… good. The ocean was still too loud and too big and too difficult to get a grasp on. But when it was coming one little, calm wave at a time, it was better.

"Feel okay?" Katara called from somewhere off to Toph's right. She nodded. She leaned forwards and put her hands out between her open legs so that she would have even more warning when the next wave passed over her. Some reached under her bottom and pooled behind her, while some only touched her heels and then receded. 

"I like to do this because I imagine that when every wave leaves me, it's taking away a little bit of the pain." Katara explained. Toph just nodded again, still caught in an undertow of anxiety.  _ Something too big to be seen is passing over and over me… _

"I feel that." Toph smiled a bit. "I still don't really like the beach. Or the ocean. Definitely not swimming. But I feel that. So thank you."

"No, thank you for humoring me. And for trusting me." Katara said. "Just let me know when it's time to go."

Toph winced as an especially cold wave rushed over the most tender parts of her body. "I think I'm ready now."

"Okay." Katara's voice was level. Toph could tell that she was trying to keep her disappointment from showing.

"But… do you want to keep walking along the beach for a little while?" 

"Yeah!"

Toph smiled, choosing to focus on her ability to lift Katara's mood back up rather than on the fact that she was signing herself up for staying near the giant emptiness of the sea for even longer. She missed the loop, with its closed in trees and familiar solid ground. She crawled to her dress, slipped it over her head, and picked up her cane. It wouldn't be much use walking through a few inches of moving water, so she collapsed it and tucked it under her arm. "Pass me the stick?" she held out her hand again and felt Katara gently maneuver their social distancing stick into it.

"I'll walk on the deeper side and let you know whenever a wave is hitting me, okay?" Katara called out over the sound of the waves.

"Okay!" Toph said. They started to move slowly through the water, parallel to the beach, Toph ankle-deep and Katara with waves passing her knees. 

The ocean drowned out the sound of Katara's breathing and the splash of her footsteps, so the only way Toph knew she was there was through the tug of the stick and the sound of her voice. Walking with someone other than Zuko was reminding her of how each person's gait was different, how each swung their hands in a slightly different rhythm that she had to figure out how to match up with her own. 

Usually, unless they were running, Toph asked her friends to hold her hand. That way she could feel their heart rate and their temperature. She could feel them hold her tightly or loosen their grip. That information was as important to her as the sound of their voice, and helped her get closer to having a full understanding of who they were. When she thought of who Katara was, there were still so many pieces missing.

"There are seals out there. They're only about 30 feet offshore. They're poking their heads out of the water to look around and breathe."

Toph nodded.

"I love watching seals. Wave coming. Before this year, I went on day trips to the beach almost every week in the summer with Aang and we would keep a tally of how many we saw. Sokka would bring his girlfriend Suki, too. We were always jumping waves and using boogie boards and building sand forts. Once, Aang buried me so deep it took me like fifteen minutes of effort to slowly wiggle my way out. Wave coming." Katara said.

Toph just nodded again. 

"Why are you sad?" Katara asked.

"I'm not." said Toph.

"Wave coming. You clearly are. Or bored, or something." said Katara.

"I'm just not Aang," she said, and turned her face towards Katara, hoping that it would help get what she meant across. "I'm not Aang, and this isn't a normal summer. We can't-- we can't do all of those amazing things, even if I wanted to, and I don't, because I'm not Aang."

"Wave, and I never said I thought you were," said Katara defensively.

"No, but you want me to be him." said Toph. "You jumped at the first opportunity you got to take me to the place you would go with him, to try to make it feel like normal times."

"No, I was trying to help you feel better," said Katara. "Because that's what friends are supposed to do. Wave coming."

"Maybe." Toph felt the resentment showing in her face and voice.

"Maybe you're the one who's upset that we're in a pandemic." Katara bit back."Wave."

"I need you to take me home now," said Toph.

Katara sighed heavily. "Okay. Of course. Walk uphill away from the water. A little to your right. Yeah. There are still no people anywhere near us."

They made their way up to the parking lot in silence. Without being asked, Katara paused when they transitioned onto concrete so that Toph could unfold her cane. It was only after they were through the narrow pebble path and back on an open street that Toph spoke again.

"I'm afraid of the ocean," she said.

"Oh," said Katara softly. "Why? Or, it doesn't matter why. I mean, why didn't you tell me? We didn't have to go there in the first place."

"I don't want to be afraid of anything." said Toph. "I don't want you to have to change your plans for me and my problems and my fears. Because everyone's always doing that for me."

"Toph..." said Katara. "To me, it looks like you're the one who changed your plans for me. For my want to go to the ocean and pretend that we're normal and can do normal things. You left your loop for me."

Toph just bit her lips and nodded. She hadn't planned on telling Katara about her fear. She hadn't planned on leaving the loop either, or running into her in the woods the day before, or liking her enough to invite her to come back. Everything was getting beyond her control.

"I'm going to do nice things for you sometimes, okay?" Katara said. "You're just going to have to deal with it, because I'm going to deal with it when you do nice things for me."

"Okay. Thank you."

"Of course." 

Toph's feet passed over the border from the paved street to her dirt driveway. She let go of her end of the social distancing stick, knowing that her cane and her memory could get her to the house.

"I want to hug you goodbye," said Katara.

"I want to hug you, too," said Toph. "Maybe someday I will."

"Can I see you tomorrow? Same time? We can stay in the loop if you want."

"Yeah. I'd like that." said Toph. "I'll see you tomorrow. Goodbye."

"Goodbye."

Toph's stomach twisted one last time and unclenched when she tapped her way up to the steps and folded her cane, storing it back with the umbrellas on the porch. As soon as she stepped inside the house, she felt the breath and presence of another person.

"It's just me," Zuko said. "Your parents are out in the loop looking for you. You ditched your phone, didn't you?"

"Yeah, in the clearing. How much time do I have?"

"15 minutes, tops. I have to text them that you're back." Toph nodded. Zuko was practiced at finding ways to actually support Toph while making it seem to her parents like he was on their side. "You smell like seawater. And you didn't brush your teeth, did you? Please, just run upstairs, shower, change, hide your wet clothes. I'll wash them later. You're in charge of making up a story. I'll wait down here for them and give you as much time as I can." 

Toph reached out for him and hugged him tightly. He hugged her back, even as a bit of cool water seeped through her dress and onto his clothes. She knew that this was the only break she would get between the emotional rollercoaster that was the ocean with Katara and the mess that would be confronting her parents. "Thank you so much, Zuko."

"You're welcome. Run."

She did. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave kudos/comment/subscribe/bookmark if you enjoyed this! You can also follow me on Instagram @vikingfangirl23 to see my paintings of Toph in the forest and Katara on the beach :)


	3. Telling the Story without Knowing the End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! The gay is about to intensify. Also, Aang will be making his first appearance!  
> Heads up: This chapter has implied/referenced child abuse and homophobia (bc Zuko).

Katara watched Sokka sleep, his forehead creased and his lips pressed together. He had been sleeping so much, and only watching Netflix when he wasn't asleep. She didn't think he had left the house since their short walk to the beach their first day.  
"Sokka." she said softly.

He slowly opened his eyes and focused them on her.

"Do you want to come to the beach with me?"

His brow creased even further. "No, too many people. Might breathe on me. I might breathe on them."

"It's 6:00 in the morning. Nobody will be there. And if they are, we can stay far away. This is the best chance you're gonna get to go safely all day." Katara pushed him.

"No. I'll just keep sleeping. Maybe I'll go tomorrow."

"Your loss," she said.

"Wait, Katara," said Sokka, reaching out a hand. "Can you check my phone and see if anyone called me?"

Katara walked to the outlet where his phone was plugged in and hit the home button. "Just a text from Suki. Should I bring your phone over so you can answer?"

"No." Sokka scoffed, throwing an arm across his eyes to block out the light. "It feels kind of pointless to text her now."

"What do you mean? You love her!"

"I know I love her. But I don't know what good that is right now. It's hard to know how big the risk is, and how much we're missing out on when we go so long without meeting in person. Maybe we're crazy for being so careful about distancing. Lots of people would think we are. But maybe we're crazy for being so reckless as to even come here. I just don't know. And I don't think we'll ever know."

"Go back to sleep, Sokka," Katara said. "It's too early for you to be so dramatic. I'll be back from the beach before noon."

Sokka nodded and pulled his blanket over his head. Katara watched his breathing slow, then put on a mask and started her walk to the sea.

The image of Toph had taken up more and more of Katara's brainspace over the last two days. Today, her image in Katara's mind skipped down the street alongside her to the beach. She imagined the weight of the social distancing stick in her hand, swinging in time with Toph's steps. She imagined the green sleeveless dress that her friend had worn, and how the ocean breeze pushed it close around her skin. How the water had rushed around her body when she sat down in the sand. A shiver ran down Katara's spine. She reminded herself that it was just in her head. She was alone.

When Katara reached the beach, she put her mask into her bag and left it well above the high water mark. She walked to the edge of the water and closed her eyes, trying to feel it as Toph felt it, unsure of when waves were coming, stripped of a lot of her hearing by the white noise of the water. It was terrifying. Guilt rippled through her again as she thought of all of the risks she had asked Toph to take yesterday. Guilt and then gratitude, that Toph had come anyway, and trusted her anyway, and liked her anyway. She couldn't help but feel a little confused, wondering what about herself made her worth the risks in Toph's mind. There was an hour to fill before they would meet again, so she dove into a wave and tried to let her worries pass away from her, out to sea.

\----------

Katara lay on her stomach in the clearing, watching ants march by. Just like the first day that they met, she heard Toph before she saw her. She was running again, bare feet pounding the packed dirt, hand circling her guide rope.

"Toph! I'm here!" she called out. Toph smiled, pushed her hair back from her eyes, and slowed to a walk. "You can come a little closer. There, that's six feet."

"I'm glad you're here," Toph said.

"I'm glad that you're here," Katara replied, feeling a little ridiculous but not knowing what else to say. "Was the rest of your yesterday okay?"

"Eh." Toph shrugged. "My parents were pretty pissed that I ditched my phone in the woods and left the loop without them or Zuko."

"Oh, no," Katara said. The guilt returned. "I'm so sorry. I didn't… I don't know."

"Exactly. I didn't tell you. So you don't have to feel sorry," Toph said. "But a small rebellion a day keeps me sane, you know? If you hadn't taken me to the beach, I would have done something else they didn't like. Like climb a tree, or build a fort, or give away all of the things they buy me that I hate."

"I'm still sorry that you don't get along with them," Katara said, thinking about how peaceful her relationship with Sokka had gotten since they had both gotten past their angsty preteen phases, and how unconditionally her father loved her.

"It's really okay. I have Zuko." Toph said.

"Yeah, I've been meaning to ask, how old is he? Is he more like a teacher, or like a brother, or what?"

"He's 20. So I'd say he's more like a big brother or big cousin. He's definitely annoying and pushy. But I also know that he's always on my side, not my parents'. He gets it." she said. "Do you want the whole long story of how I convinced them to hire him?"

"Of course," Katara said, propping herself up on her elbows to listen.

"Great, this is a good one. Honestly, it all started when I was like thirteen, I think. I still had a nanny who was good at aiding me, but who I didn't like very much. I knew I was a lesbian before then, but that's when I started dating one of my classmates at the Perkins School. We were super extra about it, and didn't want to keep it a secret, but I didn't know any other queer people, especially any other queer blind kids, so I didn't know how to come out to my parents."

Katara inhaled sharply, glad that Toph couldn't see her blush. Her mind stuck on the words "super extra about it," wondering if that meant holding hands, or kissing in public, or… more. She tried to imagine Toph's eyes, crinkled at the edges with her smile, pressed into another girl's neck.

"So I went online and joined TrevorSpace, where I found tons of other people with complicated relationships with their parents, especially ones who had disabilities. And my favorite person that I met was Zuko. He had just come out to his parents as gay, and… it didn't go well. He doesn't like to talk about it. But. His dad did something to him, and hurt him really badly, so he got removed from his house and put in foster care. That was almost as bad, so he petitioned the courts and got emancipated."

Katara nodded for her to keep going, then remembered to make a little sound in her throat. Toph was more animated than usual, talking with her hands and her whole face. Katara loved being able to just stare at her and take the whole story in.

"I talked to him online every day. Other than my girlfriend, he was my best friend. Even though he had an awful coming out experience, he gave me the courage to just walk right up to my parents and tell them that I'm a lesbian and I'm dating someone and that they were just going to have to deal with it. They were confused at first. But then they realized what good press it was gonna be." Toph clenched her jaw and paused.

"They already used me, their beloved blind angel child, for all of their company's social media. They already used their partnership with Perkins School for the Blind to make them look like they care about other people. Then they realized how powerful of an ally PFLAG could be. So they joined. Very publicly." She rolled her eyes. "And they learned some good stuff, of course. But it was clear that none of it was actually for me. It was for the 'gram, and for the network, and for the looks."

"I'm so sorry," Katara said, feeling like it was the only thing she ever said.

"Don't be. Because their obsession with optics is the only reason I was able to get them to replace the nanny with Zuko, a completely unqualified and broke and depressed 18-year-old."

"How?"

"Well, I told them that if I was old enough for them to use my sexuality as a marketing tool, I was old enough to pick my own aide. I told them I had found a gay guy who got disowned by his family who they could add to their list of people they personally uplifted with their generosity." Toph's voice dripped with sarcasm, and Katara had to smile. "And I just argued until they said fine. So the nanny moved out and Zuko showed up on our doorstep in Cambridge about six months after I first came out."

"And they just hired him?" Katara was incredulous.

"Oh, no. They said he wasn't qualified, which, like, he wasn't. But I got my favorite teacher at Perkins to agree to mentor him and help him get through college online while working with me. My parents still tried to kick him out. I hadn't told them about his injury. His dad left a big scar on his face, and he's blind in one eye. They said he couldn't help me because he was too disabled himself. I threatened to tell all of their corporate partners that they refused to help a gay disabled teen, and they gave in. So next, they tried to pay him minimum wage and only for hours that they literally witnessed him working, and they tried to make him pay us to live in our house and eat our food. I threatened to tell not only their corporate sponsors, but also every major organization that condemns wealth inequality. They gave in again. Now he's got a yearly salary with free room and board. When the school year starts, I think I'll even bother them until they give him a raise. So they still kind of resent the fact that he exists in our house, but he's more than halfway through college, has some savings, and is a better aide than the nanny ever was. So I call that a win."

"Wow." Katara said. "Your life is crazy. And you-- You are a badass."

Toph laughed and looked down.

"No, I mean it," said Katara, wishing Toph could see the wonder in her face. "You are fighting epic fights against your crazy rich parents and _winning_."

"Yeah, I'm kind of fabulous," Toph mimed a self-assured hair flip. "But to be fair, Zuko is fabulous, too, and none of it would have worked if he weren't literally the best aide and friend I've ever had."

"Aw, that's sweet," said Katara. She opened her mouth, but hesitated for a heartbeat before asking her next question: "What about the girlfriend? Are you still together?"

"Oh, no," Toph said. "We broke up after like two months. She doesn't even go to Perkins anymore."

"Ah," Katara said.

"Why?" Toph's smile was turning into an evil grin again. "Are you jealous? Are you in need of a gal pal?"

"No!" Katara said, putting her palms up as if that would stop Toph's teasing. "I've never dated anyone."

"But are you a lesbian?" Toph asked bluntly.

"Um." Katara blushed again. "I don't know. I don't… I don't know."

"That's okay." Toph's voice had gotten gentler. "Have you had a crush before?"

"Yes," Katara said. She was sure of that. She was sure that she had only had crushes on girls. But it still felt like there was a barrier in the way of her admitting that. "But not that often. And when I do have one, it lasts."

"My crushes last long, too." Toph said. "But I have tons of them. On everyone, all the time. I like to bother people and point out what's wrong with them, but… I really do love people. And I love imagining that they love me back."

Katara smiled and hoped the smile showed in her voice. "I'm sure they do. You're lovable." she said.

Toph was really blushing now. "Stop being so sweet," she said. "But don't apologize! Jesus, you apologize too much."

"Sorr-" Katara cut herself off. "Gosh. It's hard."

They both laughed then, and passed a moment without speaking. Katara relished the opportunity to just trace over everything about Toph in her mind, so that she could savor her and hold onto her later. She tried to memorize the lines in her shorts and the shaggy edge of her bangs, to carve them deeply enough into her mind that no amount of distance would smooth them over and erase them.

"So… you haven't come out to anyone, have you?" asked Toph.

Katara gulped. "No. I don't know what word I would use if I did."

"Do you like girls?" Toph asked. 

"Mm-hm."

"Then you can just say, 'I like girls.' And if you do, you can say 'I like boys,' too. Do you think your brother and dad and Aang would mind?"

"No," said Katara. "No, I just think it's not something we ever really talk about. Well, Sokka and I talk about his girlfriend Suki, because she's my friend too. But that's it. So it would be weird to tell them."

"Do you think you're more nervous than you pretend to be?" asked Toph.

Katara sighed. "I know you're right. I should do it. That just doesn't make it easier to actually do it."

"That's okay. No rush, right?" Toph said. "Just know that I know that you're some kind of queer, and that I like that about you. Okay?"

"Okay." 

"Can I ask you for a favor?"

"Sure."

Toph pulled her phone from her pocket. "Can I take your picture?"

Katara giggled. "I mean, yeah, but… why?"

"Zuko will describe it to me. I just want confirmation from another human that you're not too good to be true."

"Okay." Katara tried to arrange her face in a normal expression, but the corners of her mouth just wouldn't relax. With relief, she remembered that her mask covered the vast majority of her face. It didn't matter if she had on a goofy smile.

Toph took the picture. "Thanks. I can't wait to hear what he has to say."

"That's kind of scary," said Katara. "Let's make it even -- let me take a picture of you to show Aang."

"Okay. How should I pose? Like this?" Toph flipped over onto her side and posed with one hand on her hip and the other flipping back her bangs seductively. 

Katara laughed. "Sure. Beautiful. Perfect. You're killing it." She took picture after picture until Toph ran out of silly ways to rearrange her body.

"You know," Toph said, flopping back onto the ground cross-legged, "If not for the whole global pandemic situation, I would have asked you out on a date by now."

Katara bit her lip. Closed her eyes. Went for it. "I would have said yes."

The corners of Toph's eyes crinkled. "Let's do it then. Let's go on a date."

"What can we… do?" Katara asked.

"Well, we know that we can sit in the woods and talk," Toph said. "I don't know. I'll figure something out. Same time, same place tomorrow. I want to keep talking to you, but also I want to plan and fangirl about the fact that I have a date with a perfect girl tomorrow."

Katara laughed and hid her face in her hands.

"I think I need to run. And tell Zuko. Wait, can I have your number? Then we can text all day and I don't have to wait until tomorrow to hint at the awesomeness to come." Toph said.

"Of course. Here, I have my phone. I'll put in your number and text you."

Toph recited her number and waited while Katara sent her the text. She swiped her finger across her screen to have her phone read it aloud: "Toph is the most beautiful girl I know."

"I'm sorry," Katara blurted. "I didn't know what to say."

Toph shook her head. "If I could, I would be hugging you right now to make you shut up. I'm gonna go home so that I can make Zuko tell me about your picture. Then I'll text you lots. Then I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay!" Katara said. "I'm hugging you."

"I'm hugging you harder," said Toph, and she ran back along the loop and away.

Katara just sat and watched her run away. She was so strong and so fierce and so special. And she was entirely Katara's. She felt an odd sort of possessiveness now that they were… what, dating? Going on a date, at least. It wasn't like normal times, when a person would see and speak to dozens of people every day and their date was just one of them. No, Katara knew that she was one of only four people Toph spoke to, and Toph knew that she was one of only four people Katara spoke to. That was terrible, of course -- they both desperately missed having acquaintances. But it was also special. It was also precious.

A little bit breathless with excitement, she walked back to her house. Before she even reached the door, her phone pinged:

**What's your favorite color for rocks**

**Like beach rocks**

She smiled at her phone as she walked, flushed with anticipation of whatever surprises were in store for the next day.

**Uh**

**Blue is my favorite in general**

**But blue rocks are rare so I guess itd be purple**

**OK**

**Why**

**No reason :))))))))**

**Zuko is teaching me emoticons :))))))))))**

**:))**

**Tell him thanks for me**

**Will do**

Katara tried to calm her face before taking her mask off and entering the house. She wasn't sure that it worked, but it didn't matter because Sokka was still sleeping on the pullout couch, in exactly the position that she had left him in two hours earlier.

"Sokka, wake up. If you want to go to the beach today, there's probably still time before it gets too crowded." she said.

"No," said Sokka. "It's okay."

"You don't want to actually use this vacation to have fun? You just want to lie around?" Katara tried to make her tone sound nicer than her meaning was. She was just frustrated that this was the first trip outside of Greater Boston that they had taken since the summer before, and that Sokka was going to let it pass him by. He could be going for walks in the woods, or making masks, or visiting the ocean, or making a new friend.

"Yes."

"Sokka. This is the last trip we get before you go away to college." she scolded.

"So I'll use it how I want," he bit back. "And besides, I don't even know if I'm going away to college. Or if I should do online classes. Or if I should try to get another job. Or if I'll go, and there'll be an outbreak, and I'll just get sent home again." He rolled over away from her.

"I'm sorry," Katara said, mentally kicking herself for never having something better to say.

"It's fine, Katara. I'm just tired. I just want some space."

"Okay." She let him rest in the quiet and began to make herself a second breakfast of chips and salsa. At the rustling of the bag, Sokka rolled over to face her again.

"Can I have some?" he asked.

"Of course." Katara shook even more chips out into a second bowl and set their meal on the floor next to Sokka's bed. "Has Dad called yet today?"

Sokka shook his head. "I think he's working. And you know he would call you, anyway."

Katara smiled. It was true. Calling Sokka tended to lead to a lecture on whatever National Geographic article he had read last, so their dad usually called her instead and trusted her to relay any messages from her brother that were actually important. As she ate with Sokka, her phone pinged again:

**OK I think I know what we're doing tomorrow**

**It doesn't involve leaving the loop but it does involve our imaginations**

**Sounds great!**

**Hehe my phone's robot voice makes everything you say sound sarcastic**

**Oops I promise I'm not**

**Yeah don't worry I gotchu**

**Have you impressed Ang with my picture yet?**

**It's been like half an hour**

**So no, sorry**

**When are you gonna do it**

**Is it soon**

**Is it soon**

**Calm down**

**Idk what he's doing today so idk when we'll talk**

**But I'll tell you right away**

**OK**

**OOH I had a thought**

**What is your thought**

**I haven't seen you without your mask on since we first met**

**And I was too busy yelling at you to really look**

**Lol**

**Can you send me a pic of your whole face?**

**Of course <3**

**[image]**

**Zuko took it so if it's bad it's his fault**

The picture was perfect. She was clearly in a bedroom, either hers or Zuko's, with unfolded clothes piled behind her and a heavily annotated calendar on the wall. Zuko's, then, because Toph would have no use for a paper calendar. Beneath her distinctive bangs, arched eyebrows, and smiling eyes, Toph had a small nose and thin lips that were tugged up into a grin on one side but not the other. Her jaw was gently curved to a point. _Kissable_ was the first word that Katara thought of, and then she was overwhelmed with nerves over the fact that _that_ , of all words, was her first thought.

**Nah he did great**

**You're adorable**

**OK your turn**

**Send me your face and so I can make him tell me about it**

**OK**

Katara should have expected that Toph would ask for a picture in return, but still, it caught her by surprise. She looked over her shoulder to make sure that the screened-in porch was free of mess and ready to be her background. Then she checked her own face, resenting herself for not keeping up with her skincare routine or for washing her hair that morning. But it would be fine. It had to be fine. She smiled, took the picture, and hit send before she had time to question herself further.

"Okay, who are you texting? You never check behind you before you take a selfie," Sokka asked.

"Oh, uh, a friend from school. She wanted to see what the house was like, so I wanted to get a good view of the porch in it." Katara said, words stumbling over each other in an attempt to speak quickly. She was never good at lying, but at least it was a step up from the day she tried to make an excuse for showing up in Toph's backyard.

"Huh. Make sure you get the outside of the house, too. It's kind of cute how small it is," Sokka said. He returned his full attention to his chips, so Katara returned her full attention to Toph.

**Oh lord we're being summoned by my parents**

**Ttyl**

**OK! Good luck!**

Katara sighed. In between bites of food, Sokka looked like he was drifting back to sleep. Again, she was essentially alone.

She texted Aang. No answer. 

She called Aang. No answer.

She texted Dad. No answer.

She tried to think of anyone else from school or from the neighborhood or from her yoga class or swim team or from anywhere else who she wanted to talk to. There was no one.

She stood on the porch and stared down the street. It would be wonderful to be able to go to the beach, to be free of people but surrounded by seals and ocean. But traffic was picking up. The parking lot would be full by now. The beach was no longer safe. 

So instead, she settled into her body there on the rug. She listened to Sokka's deep, calm breathing. She matched the timing of her breaths with his, and timed her movement through some seated yoga poses with her breath. She reminded herself that she could exist when she felt alone. She could exist when she felt unsafe. And she could exist when she felt so much new love for a girl that she thought her heart must be beating out of her chest.

It was fine. Everything was fine.

\----------

Aang finally called Katara back that evening, when she was finishing up the dishes from dinner. Sokka was still on the pullout couch, so she went onto the screen porch and closed the door to the main room for some semblance of privacy.

"Aang! I missed you!" she said as soon as her best friend's wide grin showed up on her screen.

"I missed you too! And so did Appa!" Aang laughed as his beloved dog pushed him out of the frame and barked at Katara through the screen.

"Aw, I love you Appa! I wish you were here," Katara said. "Seriously, the beach isn't the same without you and Gyatso and Dad and Suki."

Aang frowned. "Next summer, I hope." he said. "If your dad keeps saving the world like he's doing. He's been working even more since he sent you away."

"Uh oh." said Katara. She knew that her father would take on more than he could handle before he would let any work go undone. "Thanks for keeping an eye on him. He's working now, right?"

"Yep, all day. It was a 12-hour shift that started at 9am. He told us we could have laundry all day because he wouldn't be home. And, Katara, you can try calling him when he gets home, but… he's really tired." Aang said.

"How can you tell?"

Aang shrugged. "He's walking around like he's sleepwalking. And whenever he calls us about laundry or mail or something he sounds exhausted and doesn't want to talk for long."

"Thanks for telling me," Katara said. She smiled grimly. Taking care of her dad was a lot easier with neighbors who were on her side.

"But how are you and Sokka? How's vacation?" Aang asked. She could tell that he was trying to cheer her up. She let him.

"It's good. Sokka sleeps a lot and is really boring, but, I actually have some big good news."

"Yeah?" Aang's face lit up.

Katara took a deep breath. "I met a girl. In the woods. And I really like her. And she likes me. So she asked me to go on a date with her tomorrow."

Aang's face went from excited to confused in the space of a second. "You what? How?"

"In the woods," Katara repeated, then realized how stupid that sounded. "Her name is Toph. She was going for a run and I was going for a walk and we crossed paths and started talking. We keep our masks on, of course. And we stay apart. But she's really smart, Aang. And she's determined and good at arguing and she can do anything she sets her mind to, even when it scares her."

"So, you're just… dating, now? From six feet apart?"

"Yeah. It sounds crazy but, I really like it. I'm so excited to see her tomorrow. Aang, I've never felt like this before. And she feels the same way. I can tell from the way she talks to me. Here, I'm gonna text you a picture of her." She scrolled through all of the pictures from their photo shoot earlier, trying to decide which ridiculous pose fit Toph best. Ultimately, she decided to just send the full-face picture that Zuko had taken. It captured the lopsided grin that she had been missing out on up until that day.

"That is crazy, Katara," Aang said. "Wait, is that a filter on her eyes?"

"Oh, no," Katara hadn't thought of how to tell Aang this part. "She's blind."

"Oh," said Aang. He blinked rapidly, and she could practically hear the gears turning in his brain. "Wait, so… are you gay? Are you a lesbian?"

"Um," said Katara. She felt like she was standing on the edge of the sand, watching a freezing wave roll towards her. It was going to hit. But she could decide whether or not she wanted to step into it and get the cold over with on her own terms. "Yes. I am. I like girls."

"Oh, cool. I didn't know." Aang said. "I mean, I sort of knew. You were really obsessed with Shailene Woodley for a minute there."

Katara blushed into her hands. "Please don't bring up that shameful part of my past. All of middle school is strictly off-limits."

"Okay, okay." Aang put up his hands in defense. "I'm really glad you're coming out, and I'm glad that you're happy."

Katara narrowed her eyes at him. She could feel a "but" coming.

"But what are you going to do when you come home? And when you want to do more than just sit in the woods and talk?"

"Well, she lives in Cambridge when she's not on the Cape. So we can probably walk or drive to see each other pretty easily when she gets back. I'm just not sure when that's going to be, because she owns the house she's staying in here. She could stay here the rest of the summer." Katara felt her joy start to crumble under scrutiny. "I don't know where it's going, Aang. It just makes me happy right now. And very little else does."

"I know." he said, and sat quietly in thought for a moment. "I just don't want her to break your heart. You know? Like, she probably won't on purpose. She seems great, and you trust her, and you have good taste in people. If I do say so myself."

Katara rolled her eyes.

"But seriously. I just… I want you to be ready to not see her again. That's always a risk when you start a relationship, especially when it's with someone you meet randomly on vacation. And especially when you're in a global pandemic, and the United States just passed four million confirmed cases."

"Oh, shit," she said. "I didn't check the case count today. I didn't know that."

"Yeah." said Aang. She knew he was feeling the same weight in the pit of his stomach that she was. The weight of all of those deaths, and of all of the ones they both knew were still to come. And she knew it was selfish and shortsighted, but the idea of not seeing Toph again felt worse. It felt like an attack from Aang directly against her. It felt like their safe, distant space out in the woods had shattered.

"Listen, I don't want to hang up on a sad note, but I do really need to finish the dishes," said Katara. "Tell Gyatso and Appa and Momo that I love them."

"I will. And I'm sorry if I upset you," said Aang. "I'm just worried about the risk."

"I know. It's fine." Katara said. "Really, Aang, you're a great friend. Don't worry about it. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Katara put her face in her hands and let herself lay back onto the small bench on the porch. Maybe Aang was right. It was only going to end. And Sokka had said that he couldn't tell what was worth the risk anymore. Not just the risk of getting or spreading coronavirus, but also the risk of ending up with a broken heart. She felt like lashing out. She felt like running or throwing something or doing something reckless. So she called Toph for the first time.

"Hi, Katara!" Toph sounded cheery on the other end. "What's up?"

"Hi," said Katara. Dammit, she hadn't thought this far ahead. Now she was full of Toph-induced butterflies and empty of things to say. "Um, I showed your picture to Aang."

"What did he say?"

 _That I have no future with you_ , Katara thought. "That you look nice. That you look like someone I should be with." she made up.

"Oh, okay," said Toph, her voice a little less upbeat. "That's great! Are you excited for our early morning date tomorrow?"

"Of course," said Katara.

"Are you going to stare at my picture until you see me again?" Toph was clearly joking, but Katara still clicked out of the call screen to look at Toph's picture while they talked.

"Yes. This beautiful, beautiful picture is all I need in life." Katara tried to match her overly-sweet, sarcastic tone. She hoped she was pulling it off.

"Aw, thanks, sugar queen. You're in for a treat, then," said Toph, and Katara could've swore she could hear that crooked smile over the phone. "Tomorrow morning, I will give you something even better to remember me by."

Katara's breath accelerated. "What is it?"

"You'll just have to wait and see," said Toph. "For the sake of honesty, I'll tell you that it's really not a big deal. But for the sake of mystery, I'll tell you that it should keep you awake tonight and on your toes in the morning."

"I'm intrigued," she said. Her legs squeezed together reflexively. "Okay, I think that's all of the teasing I can handle. I'll see you in the morning?"

"Oh yes. Get excited." Toph said. "Goodnight, Katara."

"Goodnight, Toph."

Katara exhaled with relief as soon as the phone was hung up. She peeked through the door to see that Sokka was fast asleep, not listening in on her conversation. Not watching her struggle with the way that her regular nervous butterflies had turned into this warmth and pressure that was moving lower in her stomach. Katara curled up around that feeling and let it carry her to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and especially for the kudos, comments, bookmarks, and subscriptions! You can also check out my instagram (@vikingfangirl23) for my painting of Toph and Katara together at the beach :)


	4. Something Too Big to Be Seen

"Describe her again." Toph said, dangling her phone over Zuko's face.

"No." He batted her hand away, and she let him. He had been fully asleep when she threw her full weight into his bed and shone the light of her phone in his eye. "You know what she looks like. You need to take a chill pill, and let me sleep. I cut fabric for like twenty masks in the last two days and you haven't worked on any of them. Go do that instead."

"I've been busy with a pretty girl!" Toph exclaimed. "But still, that's a lot of fabric. Let me guess why. You didn't sleep last night, did you?"

"I slept a little bit."

"Not enough."

Zuko sighed heavily, and she felt his weight shift in the bed. "Maybe my sleeplessness has something to do with the fact that you've been wandering around the house telling Siri to text Katara 'colon right parenthesis right parenthesis right parenthesis' all the time."

Toph giggled. 

"I'm okay, Toph. I'm just channeling my energy into saving lives, and I happen to do it late at night. You don't have to worry about me."

"I'm going to," Toph said. "You're rubbing your face again, aren't you?"

"No."

"Lying to me is a waste of your breath." she said gently. She fumbled along his bedside table, knowing that he kept his patch close by but not knowing where exactly.

"A couple inches to your right." Zuko said. "Yeah, thanks." He took the soft eye patch from her and placed the strap around the back of his head. Like a bandaid, it gave him something to fidget with other than his own damaged skin. It always made Toph feel oddly satisfied to know that their relationship wasn't employer-employee like her parents wanted it to be. The best thing Zuko did for her was let her do things for him.

"You really had a rough night, didn't you?" Toph asked. 

"Yes."

"A few in a row, seems like."

"Yes."

"Can I help? Distract you, maybe?"

"No."

"Did you call Mr. Iroh?"

"No."

"I need you to call Mr. Iroh by the end of the day tomorrow."

Zuko groaned. He knew from experience that when Toph "needed" him to do something, it was in his best interest to do it. "I promise that I will call Mr. Iroh by the end of the day tomorrow."

"Good." Toph stayed there a moment longer, listening to his breath stay short and alert. "I'm going to see Katara. And I'm going to make sure we keep seeing each other, pandemic be damned." 

"If anyone is stubborn enough to do that, it's you," Zuko said.

Toph smiled, warmed by his approval. It made her feel ready for the day. She punched him gently and stood up. "I love you."

"I love you, too, brat," he mumbled back. "Now go away."

"Okay." Toph walked to the door and stood there for a little longer, still concerned for her best friend. His breathing still didn't slow.  _ Okay. Time to go. _

\----------

After doing a lap around the loop to clear it of debris, Toph waited in the clearing for Katara with her gift. It was heavy in its paper bag, leaned up against her knee. It was a lot. Toph knew that she was extra and knew that she was stubborn and knew that she committed to things too early and too wholeheartedly. Still, she was proud of her work. She just hoped that Katara would be happy to receive it. She had thought that "I would have asked you out on a date by now" was the gutsiest sentence she had ever uttered, but some of the things she had in mind for today might be even more. So far so good, she repeated over and over. Nothing that bad had happened yet. Maybe nothing bad would happen for a little bit longer.

"Toph!" Katara called from away in the woods. Toph raised a hand and waved in her general direction, waiting until she was closer to begin to speak.

"I missed you, sweetness," she said. "That was a lot of hours apart."

Katara laughed. "Truly, a tragedy of Shakespearean proportions."

"Truly." Toph bounced on her heels with excitement. "Can I give you your gift?"

"Yeah! Just, is it safe?" Katara asked.

"I haven't touched anything inside of the bag since last night, and it's all porous surfaces. That's long enough that any virus should be dead, if I was carrying any to begin with, which I doubt. So I think it's pretty darn safe, but if you want to open it later, I understand." Toph explained.

Katara hesitated. "I think I'll open it now. Yeah. That's a pretty small risk."

Toph nodded and placed the bag on the ground between them, then backed up. She heard Katara shuffle the bag closer to herself and open it. She smiled with anticipation as Katara gasped with delight, just as she had jokingly predicted.

"It's beautiful!"

Toph imagined Katara's hands lifting the stiff piece of cardboard from the bag and tracing over the stones that she had hot-glued to it. They were all purple, she knew. She had checked them with a phone app that sensed color, and then passed them over to Zuko for a double-check. 

"What does it say?" Katara asked.

"It's your name. K-A-T-A-R-A." Toph said proudly. "I figured that if you're going to date me, you better learn at least a bit of Braille. Even though I barely ever use it. Text-to-speech is so much faster. But still! It's your name!"

"Thank you so much," Katara said. "Thank you. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Wait, so where did you find a ton of purple rocks?"

"Zuko and I went to the ocean," Toph said. "I'm getting more used to it. It wasn't so bad the second time around. And it was easier holding someone's hand. I picked up a bunch of rocks and then we sorted them by color together and took the best ones home."

"Wow," Katara said. "Wow, Toph, this is really incredible."

"I'm so glad you like it," she said, feeling a little release of pressure in her chest. "Are you ready to enter our fantasy world date?"

"Yes! Where are we going?"

"First, we are going to a magical and faraway place called… my room! It's a room tour!"

"Uh, but, in our minds?"

"Yeah. You'll see. I've actually done this with my classmates at Perkins before we visited each other's houses. With them I focused more on how to not break anything or hurt yourself, but with you, I can just tell you about all of the fun that we'll have in my room someday." Toph felt herself starting to pick at the weeds growing in front of her. She hadn't meant to talk about the future so openly and so early.

"That sounds perfect," said Katara.  _ Good. She wasn't scared away yet. _

Toph stood, mapping out the room in her mind. She would never admit it to Katara, but she had spent most of the day before sitting in the middle of her temporary room remembering what her room at home in Cambridge was like. It was the safest place in the world, but also, it hadn't been touched since the last week of March, so it was like a time capsule. A reminder of the past and a promise of a future where Toph could not only return to her real home, but bring Katara with her.

"Okay. I'm imagining that I'm standing in the doorway. The floor is wood. If I reach out to my right, I can touch the foot of my bed. It's waist-high with lots of heavy blankets, even in the summer. To my left, there's a bean bag that I'll trip over unless I take two steps straight forward before turning. My bookshelf is up against the wall. That's where my laptop and Braille writer live. I have a couple books in Braille, but I don't like them as much as audiobooks. Oh, and there are CDs and a CD player that I labelled with bump dots. Past that is my desk, right next to the window so that I can sit near the cacti on the windowsill and get fresh air when I'm doing schoolwork."

"That sounds so peaceful," Katara said.

"It's one of my favorite places to be. There's a second chair so Zuko can sit with me, too. He says he can see people rowing by on the Charles River, which is like a block away, because we're all the way up on the third floor."

"I love walking along there. And kayaking and paddle boarding in the summer." said Katara.

"I'd go kayaking with you," said Toph. "I'll be the muscle, and you can steer."

"Hey, are you saying I don't have muscles?" Katara asked teasingly.

"When it's safe, we can arm wrestle. And I'll win, and then you'll admit that I'm stronger than you. And then I'll give you piggyback rides everywhere." Again, Toph's mind kept lunging into the future. She wished that she was closer to Katara, or touching her, so that she could tell if her long-term planning was making her uncomfortable. "But anyway, I almost forgot the last and most important part of the room. I have a pottery wheel. So when I'm at home, I play with clay every day. I'll make a small bowl on the wheel, or roll out coils to make a cup or a fun sculpture. I'm really good at it, too. I wish I had my clay here so I could make something for you."

"That's okay," said Katara. "Maybe someday."

Toph hoped Katara didn't read too much into the smile that she knew was showing through her eyes above her mask. She was thrilled that her date had at least a little stake in their future, too.

"Yeah, someday. But for right now, you need to show me around your room."

"Of course." Katara said. She paused, and Toph gave her time to organize her memories of her room before speaking. "It's blue. I know that doesn't mean anything to you, but--"

"It's your favorite color," said Toph. "It's the color of the ocean, your favorite place. Of course it means something to me, even if I can't see it. It means you."

"I want to hug you for that," said Katara.

"Someday," Toph repeated.

"Yeah, someday. So my room is blue. It's small and carpeted and covered in little trinkets and drawings from people I care about. Your gift will fit in nicely. I have a closet overflowing with clothes, and a lot of books. I love stories. And I have trouble giving anything away." Katara said. She hesitated.

"What's wrong?" Toph said.

"I… don't know," said Katara.

"Is it Aang?" Toph asked. She could tell that insecurity sounded like anger in her voice, but she couldn't stop it. "When I asked you what he thought of me, you lied. What did he really say?"

"Toph. He doesn't have anything against you personally. He knows that I don't like new people or get to know new people that easily. He knows that you must be special," said Katara.

"But?"

"But he's worried about what will happen next." Toph could hear the tightness in Katara's chest and throat as she spoke, quickly, anxiously. "I really, really like you, Toph. I want to see you every day. I want to hold your hand and I want to hug you. I want to see your room. But I am halfway through this vacation week, and you could stay here until the end of the summer. Even if we both moved back to the Boston area, how would we see each other? Would I have to bike like six miles and across the river every time I want to see you? Or get on public transportation and put my dad at risk? And then all we would be able to do is sit, just like this, and just talk."

"I thought you liked talking to me," Toph said.

"I do! I just--"

"Fuck." Toph put her face down in her hands. "I know that's not the point. I know that's not what you're upset about, and it's not what I'm upset about either." She took a deep breath, trying to think about how she wanted to say what she wanted to say. "Katara, I know that the more time we spend together and the better we get to know each other, the more it will hurt if we lose touch. And I also know that the more we do things like give each other gifts, or get closer to each other, the bigger the risk is that you're exposing your dad to the coronavirus. But I still think that there's… almost like a sweet spot. That there's an amount of time we can spend together and an amount of risk we can take that's worth it. That's more than worth it. And I think we're not there yet, I think we can do more before the risk is too great."

"Like what? How?"

"Like." Toph huffed in frustration. "I think we should talk every day until you go. And I think we should talk on the phone every day after that. Just for a little while every day. Just enough that we keep learning new things about each other. I like talking to you on the phone. It's not that different from how I'm talking to you right now."

"Right," said Katara. "But I really want to see you. And I don't just want to talk to you, I want to be able to do things with you. New things. And things I can only do with you."

"Katara..." Toph paused. This was her biggest ask yet. "I think we can find ways to touch each other while you're still here. I've been in my four-person pod since March, and you've been in your three-person pod. The chance that either of us has the coronavirus is tiny. I did some reading, and I know that there's a whole spectrum of amounts of safety. It's not like either we've shared all of our germs, or we've shared none of them. So far, I think we've shared none of them. But we can get closer to an in-between."

"What are you suggesting?" Katara asked flatly.

"Well, like you said. I think we can hold hands. We can touch legs. We can take showers as soon as we get home, and keep our masks on tightly the whole time. You can decide for yourself if it's worth it or not, but for me, I know that you're worth the risk."

Toph waited for an answer, listening to Katara's breathing and wishing that she could read her temperature and heart rate to get some idea of what she was thinking.

"Okay," Katara said.

Toph blinked. "Okay?"

"Okay. We can try touching."

Toph exhaled shakily, her relief quickly turning back into nerves. She hadn't expected to persuade her. She hadn't expected to get this far, to the point where she was actually about to break the bubble of touch that she had been trapped in since her school closed. 

"What changed your mind?"

"You," said Katara. "Just… the idea of leaving you having missed out on something special. Having missed out on actually being with you."

Toph smiled, hoping that it showed through her mask. She readjusted her seat on the forest floor and reached one hand straight out towards Katara's voice. She heard Katara shuffle closer through the leaf litter.

Their hands met. Toph gasped.

"It feels like I'm meeting you for the first time," she said.

Katara's hand was cool and soft in her own. With her fingertips, she traced over chipped nail polish and smooth nail beds, the dimples made by Katara's knuckles, and the large vein that ran through the center of the back of her hand. Toph flipped it over and felt a little sweat and a little dirt from the clearing clinging to her palm. When she traced Katara's love line with her thumb, she felt a shiver run through her friend's body.

"That tickles," she whispered. They could whisper now. They were close enough that Toph no longer had to strain to hear her breathing or project her voice to speak. "Give me your other hand."

Toph obeyed and felt Katara arrange their hands so that they were palm to palm with fingers overlapping, then interlocking. With the tip of her thumb, she traced circles around the soft fold where Katara's thumb met her hand. 

Katara giggled breathlessly. "Toph, you're making the dumbest things feel really, really good."

"No, you are," Toph said, smiling. She was hanging onto every word Katara said, every hitch in her breath, and every beat of her heart through her hand. Gently, she disentangled their fingers so that she could slide her hands up Katara's forearms, feeling the delicate bones of her wrists and the strong weight of her arms. Toph's mind was already mapping the rest of her body, past her shoulders, over her ribcage to her soft stomach to the hollow between her hips. "Where else can I touch you?"

"I don't know. I still don't want our faces too close together. It still feels so wrong." Katara said.

"That's okay," said Toph. "We have time. If we run out, we'll make more."

"Yeah." Katara agreed. "Hey, do you want to arm wrestle and see who's really gonna move the kayak when we get back to Boston?"

"Oh, of course." Toph lowered herself down onto her stomach, bracing her right elbow against the ground. She felt Katara do the same, gripping her hand with a gentle but threatening pressure. "You're going down, sugar queen."

"Oh, hell no you're not." said Katara. "You runners always have the biggest egos and the skinniest arms. Did you forget that I swim competitively?"

"Did you forget that I lift?" said Toph. "Count down, and we'll see who's right."

"Three. Two. One." 

Toph was surprised by the soft whine that Katara made as her hand was forced, slowly but surely, down and down. Their hands shook and their elbows dug into the soft ground, wrists bending, as Katara fought Toph all the way until the back of her hand hit the ground. 

"HA!" Toph crowed. "I am the greatest arm-wrestler in the world! And I will never let you forget it!"

"Uggghhh." Katara groaned. "I'm out of shape because the pool's been closed. And the ground was uneven."

"Excuses, excuses." Toph released Katara's hand and sat up. "Honestly, I bet I just have way more practice than you. Zuko likes to challenge me and kick my butt. He knows I'll never say no."

"Yeah, you're a feisty little bean." Katara's hand reached out for Toph again. "C'mere."

"How close is too close?" Toph asked. She scooted towards Katara's voice.

"Faces close is too close, but bodies close doesn't have to be." Katara said. Toph felt her roll over on the ground so that she was facing in the opposite direction. With little tugs on her arms and clothes, Katara arranged Toph's body around her as the big spoon. Toph felt like she fit there, with her masked chin resting on the top of Katara's head and her arms reaching down over her date's shoulders to hold both of her hands. Katara's back was warm against Toph's chest, finally close enough that she could match up the time of their gentle breathing.

"I'm glad you can't see me smiling like an idiot," whispered Toph.

"Aw, I bet it's super cute." Katara answered. "Someday I will. And I'll tease you for it."

"And I'll arm wrestle your butt to the ground again." said Toph.

"I'm glad," said Katara. "And, Toph, I'm really glad that you asked me to take this risk." She threaded her fingers through Toph's bracelets and traced the thin veins in her wrists.

"I'm glad I did too," Toph said.

"So far, it's been worth it. Absolutely worth it."

"It has been for me, too." Toph gave her a little squeeze. "I think I know where I want to take you tomorrow."

"What, I don't get to take you somewhere?" Katara complained. "Honestly, I don't have any ideas. I just want to get even with you."

"Never." Toph growled. "We're gonna leave the loop again. Do you want to use the social distancing stick, or are you okay with holding hands the whole time?"

Katara's lungs expanded against Toph's stomach. "I think we can hold hands."

"Okay. I'm excited. Is like a mile's walk in each direction okay?"

"Yup."

"Perfect."

"No,  _ you're _ perfect."

"Shut up! Stop being so cute!" Toph disentangled her hands from Katara's and gently pushed her away. Katara laughed at her.

"Okay, I need to get my perfect gift home and wash my entire body so that I can feel a little less guilty about seeing you." Katara said. Toph nodded, sobered by the reminder that they had broken the rules. They had chosen to make their families a little less safe. She sat still, listening to Katara looking at her, waiting for one of them to make the first move to leave.

"I'm kissing you goodbye," said Katara.

"Ooh, is there tongue involved?" asked Toph.

"Uh, it's my first kiss ever, so probably not."

"Heh. It's only my, like, tenth, so I probably don't have much to teach you." Toph said. "We can try imaginary tongue another day."

"Okay. I look forward to it." said Katara. "Goodbye, Toph."

"Goodbye, Katara." 

Toph stayed there on the forest floor so that she could listen to her own heartbeat, exhilaratingly loud in her chest, over the backbeat of Katara's sneakers walking away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your kudos, comments, subscriptions, and bookmarks are always so so appreciated :)


	5. The Darkest of Nights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! You get a Zuko-centric interlude ahead of schedule :)  
> This is the angstiest chapter yet. There will be homophobic language/discussion of homophobia, and insomnia. And Mr. Iroh will save the day!

Zuko scrolled down to the bottom of his budget spreadsheet. Then to the top. All the way to the right. And back to the left. The first few times he had done this, his eyes had actually caught some of the information, and he could pretend that he was actually thinking useful thoughts about his future. That he wasn't just filling himself with dread at the thought of how close he was -- and always would be -- to slipping too far into debt, to skidding off of his career path, to becoming homeless or addicted or even more broken than he already was. Then came the thought of what his father would think and say and do if Zuko ever had to go to him for help.

He exhaled sharply. Toph needed him to call Mr. Iroh. Zuko used those words to make himself close the tab. He made himself pick up the phone, and dial, and hit call.

"Hello?"

"Hello. Mr. Iroh, I'm sorry to wake you." Zuko's heart beat fast but his lips moved slow. He let his mouth open just a bit so that he could feel himself breathe. "Toph asked me to call you."

"For herself or for you?"

"For me. It's always me." Instinctively the hand that wasn't holding the phone to his ear reached up to cup over his bad eye, rubbing over and over his patch.

"It's not always for you. And even if it were, that would be fine." Mr. Iroh's voice was on the edge of soothing and scolding, as usual. It was exactly what Zuko needed to hear.

"I know. I know."

"Zuko, why is Toph worried about you?"

"I haven't sleeped. Slept. Fuck."

"For how long?"

"Uh, I slept about an hour a day. For four days. I think."

"Do you know why?"

"No. I don't know why it started, I just know that now I can't break it." Zuko pressed the heel of his hand into his eye. "I can't get out or back to where I was before. I can't stop."

"Can't stop doing what? Irritating your face?"

"No," Zuko laid his palm flat on his face, focusing on relaxing his whole hand, making his denial the truth. "The patch helps with that. It's under control."

"Then what?"

"I'm obsessing over money again."

"Did anything change for you financially?"

"No. I just feel like it will. Any day now. For no reason at all."

"That's okay, Zuko. I'm glad that you know you have nothing to be afraid of, even if that doesn't keep you from being afraid. Let me tell you again that I will help you if anything happens. Toph and I will protect you. Remember that."

"I know. I know. Thank you." Zuko said.

"What else is bothering you?" Of course, Mr. Iroh could hear in his voice that there was something else, something worse. Something that he had been trying even harder to get away from.

Zuko filled his chest with air. He didn't think he would ever be able to talk about his sister, even with Mr. Iroh, without bracing himself first. "I keep looking for Azula. Looking at Azula. She looks okay, you know, because everybody looks okay on Instagram, but I don't think she is. I think she's-- she's cracking, or about to crack, or about to hurt someone, like those women who are always in her photos, or maybe she'll go back and hurt Dad and then he'll hurt her back--"

"Zuko, stop." Mr. Iroh spoke maddeningly slowly, forcing Zuko's brain to come down from its frantic pace. "What did Azula ask you to do when you last spoke?"

"She told me to burn in hell with every other faggot who has ever lived a short, loveless life and then died." he spat.

"No. Zuko, what did she ask you to do for her?"

Zuko sighed, hating knowing where Mr. Iroh was going with this. "She asked me to leave her alone."

"For how long?"

"For five years."

"How many years has it been?"

"Three."

"How many times have you contacted her?"

"Twelve, now."

"Oh, what did she say the last two times? You haven't told me about those yet."

"She blocked me."

"I'm not surprised. Trust her, Zuko. She's okay. You're not reaching out for her, you're reaching out for yourself. But it's not the right time yet. So we're going to have to find other things that help you. What's been working lately?"

Zuko removed his hand from his face and let it lie still, welcoming Mr. Iroh's attempt to distract him. "My patch is good. Toph and her hugs are good. Cutting fabric for masks is good. Running is good."

"Not your summer classes?"

"I can't think about school right now. The world is ending."

"You need the structure, Zuko. And your corner of the world doesn't end until you let it. Do you need me to go back to tutoring you? I can get you back on top of your work."

"No, I can do the work." He just didn't want to. And, more importantly: "I just can't  _ sleep _ ." His voice broke and his eye burned. It had been burning, and shaking, and losing focus for days and he was so far past ready for it to stop.

"I know, I know. Breathe. Breathe. Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

"Yes. Yeah." Zuko tried to pull his brain together enough to make the sentences he needed to say. "Toph has a girlfriend. They've been going on distant, masked dates in the woods. Toph's been doing exposure therapy on herself to get used to the ocean because the girlfriend loves it so much."

"Wow. And she's sighted?"

"Yeah. Apparently she's getting to be a pretty good mobility aide. Toph says my job is in danger."

"I'm so happy. For all three of you. Is their joy rubbing off on you at all?"

Zuko hesitated. Then he was honest. "No. Not really. I'm too much of a realist, I think. It can't last." 

"Why not?"

"I don't think Toph can stay attached to someone she can't touch. She can't even go six hours without hugging or punching me. And this girlfriend -- she lives in Boston. She's only here on the Cape for a vacation week. And I think the Beifongs are gonna try to keep us here for a lot longer." It was a relief to say these words out loud to someone. Zuko had been keeping his suspicions from Toph, knowing that leaving home and school had already been enormously difficult for her. She didn't need to know that it could be a very, very long time before they were allowed to go back. "They have so much control over us here. When Toph isn't in Perkins and when I'm not working outside of the house, we're so much more complacent. Better props. Worse people."

"That assessment of the Beifongs sounds about right. I'll let you know as soon as we know what reopening will look like so you and Toph can strategize for how to get back to Perkins as soon as possible. But, back to the new girlfriend -- why are you telling me all of your doubts about them?"

"So that you can tell me that I'm right and they're crazy. Sweet, but crazy, and doomed."

"Apparently they think it's worth it to try."

"Yes, but this is Toph. She thought archery was worth a try." They both chuckled at that memory.

"In hindsight, that was an entertaining adventure. Zuko, I do agree that this will end poorly, and soon. I think Toph's heart will break, but that you'll be there to help her heal. It will be awful. But maybe it will be worth it. But all that aside, it's not your choice. Not your choice what Toph does with her life, not your choice what Azula does with hers. All you get to choose is whether or not you're going to try sleeping again tonight."

Zuko sighed. "Okay."

"Are you ready to try?"

"Yes."

"Alright, I'll let you go. I'll be breathing with you, even though I'm far away."

"Thank you so much, Mr. Iroh. You've saved both me and Toph more times than we can count."

"Don't be too humble. You've saved each other. And you've saved yourselves. And you will again."

"Okay. Thank you. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you enjoyed hearing from Zuko :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is angst time, my dudes. Buckle up.

After touching Toph for the first time, Katara made a pit stop at home to drop off her gift, shower, and put all of her clothes directly into the laundry, as she knew Toph must have been doing as well. It felt odd to be trying to prevent the spread of disease between them, considering how close they had just been, but still -- the fear in her stomach made her do it anyway. She was just glad that Sokka, zoned out on the couch with his phone, didn't seem to notice.

Her next walk was to the ocean. It was more crowded then than it had been in the early mornings when she liked to walk there, but there was still space for her to get lost in her search for small, pointy rocks. They were for Toph. To tell her, in a form more permanent than spoken words, "I will keep you." She closed her eyes and buried her hands in the shallow surf, letting her fingers rather than her sight do the searching. She no longer felt more alone when she shut her eyes. Now she just felt closer to Toph.

A seal bobbed out past the breakers. Katara waved to it. Its back and tail lifted up to the sky as it dove down out of sight and swam away. "I'll be back at dawn," she whispered. Back to celebrate her last days of vacation, and eventually, back to say goodbye to the seals, to the beach, and to Toph.

Katara knew something was wrong when she reached the driveway. The doors to their car were all open, with piles of Sokka's dirty clothes spread out across the seats. She was more confused than worried, just unsettled enough to knock on the front door instead of barging right in like she usually would.

"Who is it?" Sokka's voice echoed. It must have been bouncing around in the tiled bathroom.

"It's Katara! What's wrong with you?" she called back.

There was a clatter from inside the house and Sokka ran to the door with his mask on and his eyes wide. "I've been calling you nonstop for twenty minutes! Come in! Keep your mask on!"

Katara did as he said, just hoping that it would get her to an explanation faster.

"What are you doing?"

"Katara, have you seen anyone in person since we got down here for vacation?" Sokka grabbed her by the shoulders and looked her dead in the eyes. "Have you shared germs with anyone? Have you gone anywhere? Have you touched anything?"

"I--"

Katara stopped. Stared into her brother's eyes. Toph was out to her parents, and it was fine. Zuko was out to his parents, and it was decidedly not fine. There was always a risk. Sometimes telling the truth was worth it. Sokka's frantic energy ran through her from his hands on her shoulders. But sometimes it was just too dangerous.

"No. I haven't. I haven't seen anyone at all."

Sokka released Katara and sank down onto the couch, his head in his hands. "Good. Good."

"Sokka, why?"

"We have COVID-19."

"No."

"Yes. We do."

Katara backed away from him. "No, we don't. We can't. Because we're careful, we were so careful, we never took our masks off--"

"We did. I did."

"What?"

"With Suki. I missed Suki."

"You WHAT?!"

"It was right before the trip. Just once. I thought it would be fine. It was just a day, just a few hours..."

Katara's mind raced to Toph and to Dad and to Suki and to everyone they were supposed to be protecting. To everyone they had apparently failed to protect. Shame rose in her throat and choked her, so she shoved it down with anger. 

"What, you fucked Suki in a pandemic and got yourself sick?" she spat.

"I didn't fuck anybody, Katara, I'm not that stupid. I just went to her house and brought her cookies because she's been living alone for months and no one should have to do that."

_ No one should have to live alone in a pandemic. No one should have to fall in love in a pandemic. No one should have to tell their brand new girlfriend that they had exposed her and therefore everyone she lived with to the disease they had changed their entire lives to avoid. _ Katara sat heavily on her wrinkled sleeping bag on the floor, head in her hands, trying to hold in all of the chaos in her mind.

Sokka's voice was still going, still weaving a backdrop for her panic as he moved around the room gathering their things: "I was so careful, Katara. I planned it a week in advance. We got tested before, and we were both negative. We felt fine. I only saw you and Dad, and Suki saw no one. All she did was work. So we hung out once last week, and then got tested again, and our trip to the Cape was good because if Suki or I got COVID, I would be away from Dad and he could keep working. But the results were slow and they just called me, I just found out, so we can't go home and we can't stay here, Katara. We have to get all of our stuff to the car and get out so the virus has time to die before the cleaners get here."

"Cleaners." Katara clung to the clearest words. "Here."

"Yes, here, breathing our infected air. We can't stay here. We're like disease bombs. We have to get away before we hurt someone."

_ OhfuckohshitohfuckohTophofuckfuckfuck _

"Katara. You have to help me pack and clean. Here, put on your mask. Katara, you have to help. I want to cry, too. But there isn't time."

"Oh no--"

"Katara. It's triage. Getting out of here first. Dealing with our feelings later. We'll come back to that. But we can't right now." Sokka brushed the tears from the sliver of her cheek that showed above her mask. He grasped her forearms and pulled her to her feet. "I need you to get every single thing you brought here and put it all in the car."

Katara nodded. And kept nodding while she rolled up her sleeping bag, pulled her clothes from the dresser and laundry bin, piled their food by the door. She made sure to get Toph's gift and tuck it under the shotgun seat in the car, so that she could keep it without explaining to Sokka what it was.

As they cleaned, Sokka kept talking, not caring if Katara was listening: "I think I knew. Since Tuesday, or Wednesday, I think, I've felt so tired. Like I had run across the country, but I'd barely moved. I've never slept so much in my life. I knew I was sick after I saw Suki, but I didn't know that I was going to get sick before I saw Suki. Fuck. I should've known. Fucking grocery stores are so fucking unsafe for employees. But the positive test rate is so low here and we came back negative before, and I just-- fuck. I thought it was safe enough. I just missed her. I still miss her. So much."

His panicked muttering and Katara's stony silence continued for hours. They skipped at least one meal, maybe two. Once they had everything out of the rented house, it didn't fit in the car until they rearranged it all. And still, they went back in with the Clorox wipes they had brought to wipe every surface, no matter how infrequently touched. Then they wiped it again. They opened every window and turned all of the fans up to their highest setting. They erased every trace of them ever being there. At least, every trace that they knew of. It made Sokka itch with frustration and Katara want to die of hopelessness that they couldn't know if their work had been enough. They wouldn't know unless and until it was already too late.

By then it was dark. More out of necessity than out of logic, they decided that they were done. And then they were gone.

\--------------

They turned off into a parking lot just north of the canal because Katara finally returned to reality enough to notice the sweat beaded on Sokka's face, the shivers running through his body, and the pained clench of his jaw. When she asked him how he felt, he said, "My head is pounding so hard that my vision is moving with every beat of my heart." That was when she made the executive decision that they weren't getting home that night. It was time to sleep.

The parking lot was beside a gas station and a MacDonald's, both closed and empty. It was as safe a place as they were going to find without exposing some kind stranger to their virus. The siblings snacked on goldfish, but found that their appetites were lacking. Before long, they laid down their sleeping bags on the grass.

After only a moment of trying to sleep, Sokka rolled over to face Katara. "We could do this for a while, right? Just drive around and not go home? Just until we're better?"

"No." Katara was far past the point of sugarcoating anything she needed to say. "No, we really can't. Sokka, you don't seem okay."

"It's just a headache. That's the only thing that gets to me while I'm driving."

"That's really not safe."

"We have Advil."

"Sokka, no."

"Fine. What about you? Do you feel sick at all?"

Katara thought carefully. "I might have a fever. I might be a little tired. I don't know. I don't feel anything too strongly yet."

"That's good. I think we could live in the car. I don't think we can go home."

"Don't worry, Sokka. We're gonna call Dad first thing in the morning. He'll know what to do."

"He'll never forgive me."

Katara sighed. The thought was too familiar. It had passed through her head every time she had made a decision, no matter how small, that brought her closer to Toph. 

"He will." she answered.

"You can't be certain."

"I can. Because I forgive you."

"Why?"

"Because… it's hard. And it's lonely. You were safer than you could have been. And a lot of calculating risk is just luck. And you need people other than just me and Dad. Being apart… even if you talk to Suki every day, it's never the same. I know."

"Are you missing Aang?"

"Yes. Always. So much." Katara hesitated. In the hours that had passed since Sokka told her that he had made contact with Suki, the shock had worn off and her sense of responsibility had kicked in. He had come clean with her. It was time to do the same for him. "But also. I did something bad, too. I should have told you before I did it. And I should have told you after. Just like you should have told me."

"What did you do?"

Katara looked up at the light-polluted sky as if it would tell her where to even begin. "Her name is Toph. She lives up the street from where we stayed. I went for a walk and I found her and she's wonderful so we talked and we walked. We kept six feet at first. We always stayed outside. But we got closer and she asked me out on a date and I said yes and we got closer and we never kissed, never took our masks off, but we got close and held hands and touched each other."

"Oh." In the dark, Sokka's face was unreadable.

"Do you hate me?"

"No, of course not. I could never. Besides, I did the same thing, sort of. But worse, sort of."

"But… do you care that I'm gay?"

"Oh, I'm very happy about it." said Sokka. "Suki and I are both bi. We thought  _ you _ wouldn't like it."

Relief flooded Katara's body. Not only was she accepted, she wasn't alone. She chuckled at the thought of herself being homophobic towards Suki and Sokka. "That's so stupid."

"You always freeze up when people talk about Ellen and King Princess and stuff!"

"Yeah, because I'm so anxious about you realizing that I'm gay!" Sokka joined in her laughter. For a moment, she could pretend that they were camping out somewhere, just for fun, not stranded while carrying a deadly virus. "I'm so glad we're all out of the closet now."

"Yeah."

"Not loving being out of the house, though."

"No."

"But it's okay. We'll call Dad first thing and he'll know what to do."

"Yeah."

"I have to call Toph, too." Katara said. "What will I say?"  _ I'm sorry that I loved you. It only put you in danger.  _ "Sokka?" 

He was asleep. 

"Goodnight, Sokka. I'll keep trying to figure out what to say."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts and feels and reactions. And I might throw the whole posting schedule thing to the wind for these last two chapters because I'm too excited.  
> As always, every person who leaves kudos makes my life!


	7. The Concrete Turned to Sand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More sadness!

At first Toph thought that Katara had overslept. So she called. No answer. She called again. And again. When Katara was half an hour late, Toph went to the house and got Zuko to come and sit with her on the porch, their knees touching, while she waited. They kept their masks on securely, prepared for Katara to appear at any moment.

"Do you see her?" Toph asked again.

"No. No one's moving around yet." Zuko said. He tilted his leg towards hers a little, a silent check-in. She pushed back into him in affirmative response.

Toph checked the time over and over. She grew tired with the sound of the automated voice reading off the minutes in the same tone, even as they got farther and farther from their appointed time and her anxiety rose through the roof. 

So many things could have happened. Toph was struck in that terrifying moment by the number of things she didn't know about her girlfriend. She could have lied about her age, her name, her house, her whole story. It could have been fake all along. 

Katara could love someone else. Someone better and gentler with words and less quick to anger and smarter and prettier and sighted. Someone with more experience and more common interests and more abilities than stupid little Toph. She had been fooling herself all along, Toph decided. She had pushed Katara too hard and too fast and projected her own growing feelings when they were never reciprocated, never coming from Katara.

"Do you want me to get you something to eat?" Zuko asked quietly. Toph shook her head. She needed him to stay. And eating, doing anything except waiting, felt like giving up.

Toph was running out of anxiety. It was quickly turning into anger. She tried to breathe through it like Mr. Iroh would tell her to. She spread her fingers on her knee as she inhaled, and drew them back into a ball when she exhaled. She tried to feel her whole body, and ground herself, like she always could in his tea-scented classroom at Perkins, but that life felt too far away. It was out of her reach. Like Katara. Like everything. It was just too distant to hold onto.

Then Toph knew that she had to run. Nothing else got her anger out, nothing else would make her breathing steady. It was time to run. She stood, breaking the contact between her body and Zuko's.

"Toph--"

She didn't wait to hear the end of his sentence. She didn't wait to know if he was coming with her or not. She just ran. 

Toph's feet found the ruts in the dirt road and followed them to the edge of the pavement. She ran towards the ocean, one foot on the grass, one foot on the concrete so that she stayed on track. She trusted that it was still early enough that there were few people out. And if there were any, she trusted that her posture would make it clear to them that they were going to move out of her way, not the other way around.

She got three houses down the street before hearing Zuko's steady breathing beside her. He could run circles around her if he wanted, and he could grab her and force her back home if he wanted. But he didn't. He just matched her pace. They had never run together without holding a strap between them before. It felt off-balance, off-center.

When she reached the pebbled path to the parking lot, she had to slow to a jog to keep her balance, but she didn't stop. The slowness only frustrated her more. The uneven stones probed her feet and threw her off, but couldn't break her tough skin or long stride. 

Then there was the parking lot's even ground. As soon as she felt the stability of concrete beneath her feet, Toph took off at a run again, sprinting this time. She stopped being aware of Zuko nearby. She felt so fast, like she was getting so far away. She heard the white water noise that always gave her a rush of adrenalin, a rush of fear stemming from the presence of the huge unknowable ocean. Her lungs were burning and her breath felt trapped in her mask. Those feelings told her that she was alive and in control of herself, just like she wanted to be, just like she was before Katara came and showed up every day just to stand her up and then… Toph hit the sand.

She tried to keep going. But she stumbled, ankles twisting, losing momentum with every step. The ground was never where she expected it to be, and moved whenever she touched it. It moved too much. She fell. 

As soon as her knees and elbows hit the sand to break her fall, she was lifted back up to her feet by familiar arms. "Toph, it's okay. It's okay." Zuko's quiet voice surrounded her and his gentle hands brushed the sand from her clothes and skin. 

"The finish line keeps moving, Zuko," she gasped, unsure if her heavy breathing was from running or from the lump in her throat. "In March I thought I would have people again in April. In April I thought I would have people in June. In May I stopped setting an end date because I knew it would just move again. Until Katara, and then I thought she was the end of being alone, I thought she was the finish line, I thought I had someone I could count on, but… I didn't. I don't. The people keep leaving. And can't stop them. I can never stop them."

Zuko pulled her in and hugged her tightly, almost as tightly as she hugged him back. "You can count on me." he said. "I promise. I will not leave you."

Toph believed him. She didn't know if it was because of him and his love or because of Katara and her absence that she finally broke down and cried.

\----------

Toph and Zuko spent the rest of the morning curled up with a carton of ice cream in a pillow fort on the floor of her bedroom, listening to "Jim Cain" over and over again.  _ I started out in search of ordinary things… But things didn't pan out as planned. _

Toph's heart rate had dropped and her body was still. There was just that empty, wet-eyed, dry-throated feeling of having cried a little too hard for a little too long. And the weight of a little too much ice cream in her stomach. She was ready to stop crying, stop eating, and stop thinking about Katara, at least for a moment.

"Hey," she punched Zuko lightly. "Did you call Uncle Iroh like I told you to?"

"Mm-hm." Zuko scraped the bottom of the ice cream carton with his spoon.

"Did he solve all of your problems?"

"Pretty darn close." Zuko said.

"As always." said Toph. "I miss him."

"Me too." said Zuko. "I wish he were here to tell me what I'm supposed to say to you."

"You don't have to say anything," said Toph. "I'm just going to be sad for a while. I don't expect you to drop everything or stop being happy just because I'm not."

"Oh, I'm never happy," Zuko said. Toph could hear a little smile in his voice. And a little truth.

"You're so dramatic, you make me look normal," said Toph. Zuko just laughed gently and shoved her back.

Toph's phone rang. She silenced it.

"At least check who it is first," said Zuko.

"Ugh. You do it." Rather than swipe her finger across the screen, she threw her phone at Zuko.

"Oh," he said. "It's Katara."

"Well, fuck." said Toph. 

"Are you going to answer?"

"Fuck. Fuck her." said Toph. She pulled her knees up to her chest and ran her hands through her bangs. "I don't know."

"I think you should," said Zuko. "I'll be right here. You should do it."

Toph felt him pull one of her hands down from her forehead and put her phone in it. "Actually, can you go?" she asked. "I think it might be easier alone."

"Okay. Okay." 

Toph heard him wriggle out between the two pillows that made up the doorway to the fort, and then the latching of her actual bedroom door behind him. She answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Toph," said Katara. "Hi. I'm so sorry it took so long to call. At first I couldn't figure out what to say, and then once I did, my phone died and I couldn't get home. It took me a long time to get home."

"The fuck are you talking about," said Toph. She could feel her face hardening as her mind returned to all of the speculation she had done earlier that morning. Katara had lied about coming to the loop. She could have lied about everything else, too.

"Toph. I'm so sorry. I had to leave last night and come home to Boston as fast as possible because I have the coronavirus."

Toph's mind stalled, stuck on those words. "How?"

"We got it from Suki. She works in a grocery store. Sokka went to see her without telling me or Dad. He got it from her. I got it from him. And we told Dad, and he insisted that we had to come home so that he could take care of us. So he's going to get it, too." Katara's voice broke.

"And I might have it, too," Toph realized. "Oh, no."

"Yeah. I know. I'm so sorry." Katara said again. "You should get tested as soon as possible. I'm glad that we were somewhat careful, because there is a chance you don't have it, but… there's also a chance that you do. I'm sorry that I touched you. I'm sorry that I came so close to you."

"Fuck." Toph said. "Jesus Christ, Katara, I always told you that you apologize too much."

"I'm--" Katara cut herself off with a wet chuckle, then coughed. "I mean, I'm not sorry."

Toph felt herself starting to cry again. "How do you feel?"

"Worse than yesterday. I think I started having a fever last night, and sleeping outside definitely didn't help. Now I'm coughing and I have a sore throat. And I'm so tired. It took me so long to decide what to say because my mind is moving so slowly. Sokka is worse, though. He's had a splitting headache and slept more than he stayed awake for days. I should have noticed he was sick earlier. I should have known. I'm--"

"Stop being sorry," said Toph. "I'm glad that you told me. And I'm glad that you and Sokka are home safe. And." She had to stop and clear her throat. "And I'm glad that I met you. And that I was with you. Just for a little while."

"I'm glad, too." said Katara. "For me at least, you were worth the risk."

"You're worth it for me, too."

There was only a background crackling noise on the line for a moment.

"Katara…" said Toph.

"Yeah?"

"You used the past tense."

"When?"

"You said I  _ was _ worth the risk. And it's okay if the risk of trying and failing to be long-distance during a pandemic with someone you've known for a week is too much, I just want to know now. I want to know so that I don't get my hopes up and end up waiting for you when you're not coming. Again."

"You'd be willing to try that? To try staying together right now?"

"Yes."

"Oh." Katara sighed. "I didn't think that far ahead. I thought you would just hate me. Because I put you in danger."

"We put us in danger." said Toph. "We made every decision together. That's why I want to keep you." There was so much more than that, though, so much more that Toph thought she could put into words. "I still do."

"I want to keep you, too," said Katara. "Still. You're right. I really, really want to keep you."

"So I'll get tested," Toph said. "And I'll call you. And I'll send you things. And I'll move back to Cambridge when the school year starts. We'll kayak and walk together all the time."

"Yes. We will." said Katara. "I'm so glad that I wandered into your backyard when I did."

"I'm so glad that I was running when I was." Toph's chest was getting tight again. "Katara, I need to get off the phone. I'll call you later today. I just have so many feelings. And I need to plan how to get tested with Zuko."

"Of course," said Katara. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too. But I'll see you someday soon. You're not even that far away." Toph said, for herself as much as for Katara. "Goodbye, sweetness."

"Goodbye, Toph."

Toph threw her phone against the wall of her pillow fort, accidentally collapsing it over her head. She curled around the pillows and wrapped herself in the blanket roof, steeling herself for the hard conversation with Zuko and the hard, distant month ahead of her. There was no need to move just yet. All she needed was a moment to breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you SO MUCH for every bit of encouragement on this fic! 
> 
> The last chapter will take place a week later and focus on Aang, because I miss him as much as Katara does. It'll be up Tuesday, and then I'll have to actually sit down and turn my headcanons into stories so that we can keep building this COVID AU that I'm unreasonably invested in :)


	8. Remember the Good Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter. Last chapter. <3

"Aang! Your phone went off next to me while I was meditating again!"

"Sorry!" Aang hollered through the house. He knocked the remote off of the coffee table, fumbled to pick it up, paused his show, and ran to the kitchen. With restrained anger, Gyatso handed him his still-ringing phone and turned to go back into his bedroom. Aang glanced down at it-- Katara. Oh, right, he had forgotten about their daily walk. (Again.)

"It won't happen again!" Aang said to Gyatso's retreating back.

"I love you," said Gyatso. "But that's what you said the last three times it happened." He shut the door.

Aang sighed and swiped to answer the video call. Katara's blurry but smiling face appeared on his screen.

"Hey! Did you forget about our walk again?"

"Yes," said Aang. "It was so much easier when you could come bang on my door in person. I keep leaving my phone places."

"We'll be out of the apartment soon," said Katara. "I hope. I'm coughing a lot less today, and Dad still hasn't had any symptoms at all. It's just that Sokka's still pretty bad. So we're still more than two weeks from going outside."

"That could be worse." Aang set his phone down on the floor next to the door and sat to put his shoes on. "Appa! Momo!" His pets came running when he called. They sat still while he clipped their leashes to their collars and picked up his box of sidewalk chalk.

"Did you watch the livestream of the school committee meeting last night?" Katara asked.

Aang chuckled. "You know I can't sit through those things."

"Yeah, I had to eat a lot of microwave popcorn to keep myself awake. And of course they still haven't made firm decisions, even though we're getting closer and closer to the start of school. But the main thing I remember is that educators called in to insist on fully remote learning."

"Oh, wow," said Aang.

"Yeah. Teachers' unions are kind of powerful, I guess." said Katara. "But we still don't know if they're powerful enough to win. And even though I think I'd rather learn online, I don't know if it's fair to make everybody do it, even to protect teachers. For some kids, it might just not be enough."

"Yeah." Aang knew Katara was talking about him. And other kids, of course. But mostly him. During the spring, he had barely been able to sit down for an hour a day to do schoolwork. He had even considered going back on his ADHD meds, even though they made him feel so sluggish and slow. He had passed the semester, at least. But barely.

"You're not wearing a mask," Katara said. 

"Oh no! Thanks." Aang tugged the pets back into the apartment and put on his mask before opening the door again. 

"If you get to decide between hybrid and totally remote, what do you think you'll do?" Katara asked.

"I don't know." Aang looked straight ahead as he walked down the stairs, avoiding Katara's furrowed eyebrows. "Did you talk to Toph today?"

Katara's face relaxed, just like Aang wanted it to. "I did!" she squealed. "And she and Zuko both tested negative for COVID!"

"Yippeeeee!" Aang yelled. Appa started to bark in response, and Momo glared at both of them disapprovingly.

"I know. It's so good. So, so good. I feel so much less guilty. And now they don't have to tell Toph's parents that anything happened. They never need to know that I exist." Katara said.

"Wow. That's so lucky." said Aang.

"Yeah, I guess it is lucky. I wish I could know, like, exactly which decisions kept her safe. Exactly how close I was to infecting her. I wish there was one line where the risk went from 0% to 100%, but there's not. It's just this messy gradient where nobody can ever really predict anything." Katara said.

"Gyatso says that we can change our chances, but we can't change our outcomes." Aang said. "Everything's in that gray area between what we can and can't control."

"That's so true," said Katara. "He's so smart."

Aang laughed. He missed having pai sho tournaments with Katara, Sokka, and Gyatso. Those were always the nights when he felt most certain that he had been adopted into the right family. 

"What other news did Toph give you?"

"She and Zuko took me to the beach and the seals were there. It was beautiful." Katara said, staring above the camera at what Aang knew was a blank wall in her bedroom. She was probably picturing the ocean. "And her gift is done. Hey, thanks for going out to buy me the hot glue and the packaging. I'll leave the finished product by my door later so you can take it to the post office."

"Of course!" said Aang. Katara had been talking about this gift for Toph, and planning how to ship it to her, since she had arrived back in Boston. Still, Aang had never been allowed to see it. "What did you end up writing?"

Katara blushed. "It might be too much." 

"C'mon, tell me," Aang teased.

"I wrote, 'I love you, so I will keep you.'" 

"Awww!" Aang could feel his face light up. "She'll love it. It's not too much. It's perfect."

"I want her to have something to remember the good things. The beach and the forest. In case… I don't know." Katara said.

"In case she doesn't come back?"

"I think she will." Katara said. She looked up at the wall again. "Still. Just in case." Katara frowned and stood from the edge of her bed where she sat. "Wait, I gotta close the bedroom door. Sokka decided to facetime Suki in the kitchen, for some reason. They're so loud." Her room spun through the frame of the screen as she turned and walked to close the door.

"Yeah, sometimes I can hear their voices coming up through the floor." Aang said. Appa whined and looked up at him, and he realized that he had stopped on the front steps of their tripledecker without knowing which way he was going next. "Where do you want to walk today?"

"To the river!" said Katara. She usually did. "And to the left, upriver, to see Perkins."

Aang nodded. Even before Toph entered their lives, they had loved walking to see the Perkins school on the Watertown side of the Charles river. It rose up out of the trees like the watchtower of a castle from a different time.

Aang divided his attention between keeping his distance from other people, herding Appa and Momo, and talking to Katara. They talked about the normal things that they talk about now: case counts, mask fashion, new games that can be played through Zoom. Tonight, they'll try to sync up their TVs and watch  _ Hamilton _ , just because their middle-school selves would have wanted them to.

When Aang got to the empty parking lot of a shuttered rowing club within sight of Perkins, he let Appa and Momo off of their leashes. They chased each other a bit, gently wrestling despite Appa being nearly as big as Aang, and Momo being a wiry tabby cat. They knew how to be safe with each other.

"Did you draw anything today?" Aang asked.

"Yeah! I have a new flower design. I'll text it to you." Katara paused their video and sent it to Aang. Like most of her flowers, it had radial symmetry and a mix of rounded and pointed petals. So like most days, Aang scanned the parking lot to make sure no one was coming near his six-foot bubble, then knelt and began to re-draw Katara's flower with his chalk on the concrete. Beneath it, he wrote messages that he hoped someone would read: "No matter how you feel right now, I hope that you feel better." "Love your friends from far away." "There is always beauty where you look for it." "Go with hope." "Go with courage." "Go with love."

The chalk messages went a lot faster back when there were two of them, writing and drawing together, from six feet apart. Flowers used to be Katara's job, while the words were Aang's. They left clusters of words and drawings, spaced out, all along the river and the streets of their neighborhood. Aang hoped that they made someone happy.

"This was better when you were doing it with me," Aang said when he was done. He restarted the video and panned it back and forth so that Katara could see Appa and Momo wandering across his work.

"I'll be back someday. Soon. It's not even that far away." she reassured him. He could see the little worry lines between her eyebrows. They both knew that Sokka was still very sick. They both knew that the virus could linger in their bodies even after they seemed healthy.

Aang looked out across the water at the few kayaks and singles that were winding around the river in the shadow of Perkins. There were more of them now than there had been in April and May, but still fewer than he had ever seen in his years living by the river. "Soon is a nice word, but… that's what we said in March," he said.

"And it's what we'll keep saying until it's true," Katara said firmly. "Because what else can we say?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Aang said. He looked down at his phone just to see Katara's face again, even though he had it so well memorized that he knew what expression she was making at any given moment. Just to be sure. "You'll be able to leave the house someday soon. And even now, you're never that far away."

"No. No one is." Katara said.

Aang called his pets back to him and clipped their leashes back on. With his chalk and his digital window into Katara's room, he walked back home. The apartment he had spent too many hours in was waiting. And beside his best friend's door there would be a package full of love for him to send away to Cape Cod, where it would make two distant people feel a little less far away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who stuck with me until the end. I LOVE hearing your thoughts and feelings!  
> I've already written some scattered scenes in this world that take place later on. I'm in school full-time and working part-time, so it'll definitely be a minute before any more significant work comes out, but it is coming. Eventually. I think.  
> :)

**Author's Note:**

> Notes about my experience vs. my writing: I am a mixed Black queer teen from Massachusetts. I'm not blind, nor do I know any blind people personally. I'm not Inuit, and I don't know any Inuit people personally. I did research in order to write characters who aren't like me as well as I can, but if I messed something up, please tell me and I will fix it.
> 
> A note about inspiration: I wrote this because I was inspired by Avatar, obviously, but also by LA Web Series by Violet Wave Productions (available on Youtube). Toph and I have both been listening to the song Jim Cain by Bill Callahan too much, so that's where the title and chapter titles come from. 
> 
> Please comment and leave kudos if you enjoyed this :)
> 
> Also follow me on Instagam @Vikingfangirl23 to see fanart I painted specifically for this fic!


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